Bonnie l. hays animal shelter photos

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submitted by XAXOPIG to u/XAXOPIG [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 05:04 ProposalEcstatic3944 Crazy for K9s Knoxville Tennessee- Fosters Needed

Crazy for K9s Knoxville Tennessee- Fosters Needed
Bonnie didn’t even get off her cot when I went up to her cage, she just looked up at me and looked away đŸ“· she’s deteriorating in the shelter and needs a foster asap. đŸ“·
kraig is a huge babbby, butt wiggles and rubbing up against the cage when I went up to him! he’s big headed with a medium built body lol don’t let the photo full you. Lol
Draco called me from across the hall đŸ“· he’s super friendly, needs a bit of training when it comes to jumping and pulling on the leash; but he’s all kisses and just wants to wrap you in hugs!
*im patiently waiting for info to come in to post about the mommas and 2 only animal homes- but these 3 are also on my list, and seen them posted on YW website!! đŸ“· and decided to post them as well, more info to come!*
Krazy For K9’s Rescue, Inc

https://preview.redd.it/kzavxq063x3b1.jpg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d38ab8621a81cc5534d6d69fe8f210aaeefeeb15
https://preview.redd.it/v1b5rp063x3b1.jpg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e1dade8b40e20e058bf4cf8f76a626ae9ea07702
https://preview.redd.it/d83iocf03x3b1.jpg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7952177ad0d9389f10f9db76db6a76c060590b31
submitted by ProposalEcstatic3944 to rescuedogs [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 04:33 Munchulax [US][Selling] Miscellaneous volumes for sale

Hi, I am trying to clear out some miscellaneous volumes I no longer need! I've added several volumes that weren't in my last post.
Prices don't include shipping, but after $50, I'll take $5 off shipping. Please feel free to make offers, especially if you are bundling many volumes! Thank you!
Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/8PU1fiL I tried my best to photograph any noticeable defects.
Additional photos for the books that are horizontal in the current timestamp photo (from a previous post): https://imgur.com/a/XnEwqnU
Volume Price Condition Condition Notes
5 Centimeters Per Second $7.50 G3
Adachi and Shimamura Manga 1 $6.00 G4 Crease on front cover, scratch on back cover
After the Rain 1 $6.00 G3
Animal Crossing: New Horizons 1-3 $14.00 G4
Bakemonogatari, Part 2 : Monster Tale Free G1 Severe water damage
Bakemonogatari, Part 3 : Monster Tale Free G1 Water damage
Barakamon 18+1 $8.00 G4 Imperfect cover
Chio’s School Road 1 $4.00 G2 Spine impact damage
Flying Witch 1 $5.00 G3
Gakuen Polizi 1 $5.00 G3 Yellowing, sticker on back
Hakumei and Mikochi: Tiny Little Life in the Woods 8 $8.00 G4
Hanamonogatari $5.00 G3
Horimiya 1 $6.00 G4 Back cover has slight crease, wouldn't show up in photo
Horimiya 12 $6.00 G5
Horimiya 13 $6.00 G4 Front cover has slight crease
I've Been Killing Slimes for 300 Years and Maxed Out My Level 1 $5.50 G4
Inukami! Omnibus 2 $7.00 G3
Koizumi Loves Ramen Noodles 1 $5.50 G4
Kubo Won't Let Me Be Invisible 3 $6.00 G4 Dent on back cover
Laid-Back Camp 1 $6.50 G4
Laid-Back Camp 1 $6.50 G4
Laid-Back Camp 4 $7.00 G5
Mamotte Shugogetten 2 $6.50 G4
Mamotte Shugogetten 4 $5.00 G4
My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, as I Expected 7.5 $7.50 G4 Spine tear
Otorimonogatari $5.00 G3
Pokémon Adventures Collector's Edition 2 $8.00 G4 Back cover creased
Prince Freya 1 $5.50 G4
Ran and the Gray World 7 $6.00 G3 Front cover creased
Shikimori's Not Just a Cutie 1 $6.50 G4
Suspension: Kubitsuri High School $6.00 G3
The Way of the Househusband 5 $6.50 G4 Scratch on back cover
Toilet-bound Hanako-kun 1 $6.00 G4
W Juliet 1-3 $15.00 G3
Attack on Titan 25 & 26, My Hero Academia 11 & 21, One-Punch Man 16 $4.50 ea or $20 for all 5 G3-G4​
submitted by Munchulax to mangaswap [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 04:13 Seastarstiletto The Chicago train cat is now up for adoption!

The Chicago train cat is now up for adoption!
If you’re familiar with the L-riding cat and fell in love with him, you’re in luck! He was brought to the shelter by the stop in Oak Park! His name is Ellis (in honor of his love for the L) and he is ready to find his new stationary home!
Check him out at the Animal Care League website!
submitted by Seastarstiletto to chicago [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 02:25 BabyStormpa Human Cockfighting League

Float like a butterfly, sting like a penis. That's the long and short of it. I'm Max Reilly, and I run the human cock fighting league.
The game is simple. It's the best of five rounds, the fighter with the most hits wins. But, the fans are really here to see a knockout.
(And the winner is... Chub Norris!)
[Cheering]
Chub has been the reigning H.C.F.L. champ, three years running. That's one more tool belt for the trophy case. He's gotten so good, the other fighters, they don't have a choice but to play dirty.
(Keep it below the waist! That's your first warning!)
(Hey, hey, hey! Hands behind your back. Members only!)
Cock fighting isn't just some kind of pissing contest. It's an acceptance of one's full humanity. Exposing our most private parts and enduring excruciating pain. And believe it or not, a lot of our fans are vegans. Although we aren't exactly a legal operation, we are ethical. Human cock fighting provides the same kind of excitement that any animal fighting would provide. But, in a consensual, cruelty-free package.
(That's my dick tonight!)
That's why animal rights groups and local shelters are our biggest sponsors. We're putting the "human" back in "humane."
Most men are insecure about the size of their schlong. But, here at the H.C.F.L., we celebrate all shapes and sizes. So we created four different weight classes: knob, cock, dong and chode. No matter what size you are, if you want to battle with the pros, you gotta to train like a pro. You practice how you play: hard. But a good training day just.. it goes to waste without proper recovery. And, in accordance with H.C.F.L. regulations, every fighter has to weigh in before every fight.
For our uncircumcised fighters, we enforce the "don't be whack, pull it back" motto. At the end of the day, we need everything to be fair and square.
After a match, if I spot an erection lasting more than four hours, I know someone's been doping. That's an automatic suspension. On the flip side, sometimes fighters get performance anxiety, and that's where good coaching comes in.
(I need you to focus, you have to get that dick up! You have to get that dick hard! Who's the big boy? Who's the big boy?)
(I'm a big boy, I-I'm a big strong boy.)
(Say it again.)
(I'm a big strong boy!)
(AGAIN!)
(I'M A BIG STRONG BOY!)
(AGAIN!!!)
(I'M A BIG. STRONG. BOY!!!)
(GET IN THERE!)
Human cock fighting isn't just a sport, it's a community, a community of people who are a cut above the rest.
submitted by BabyStormpa to copypasta [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 02:04 ProposalEcstatic3944 Knoxville TN- Crazy for K'9s Needs Knoxville Foster for Peterbilt

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=254766883891230&set=a.190551980312721&type=3

Meet Peterbilt!
Handsome GIANT BOY! He’s showing signs of shelter deterioration, also possibly needs his hip checked out. People are mistaken this big 103# Teddy Bear as aggressive when walking by him bc he’s confused and unsure of new people but give him a treat and immediately gains all his trust đŸ“·đŸ“·
We are looking for a EDUCATED on mastiff breeds FOSTER while we have a trainer evaluate him, and a vet looked at him. He would need to be in a home with no kids, no other animals- until we can properly test him & evaluate him.
Just look at that faceđŸ“· he’s been through war, let’s be his refuge đŸ“·đŸ“·
đŸ“· #LetsFreePeterBuilt đŸ“·
đŸ“·Foster needing to be located in the Knoxville area đŸ“· Foster MUST be educated with the mastiff breed and can handle 103 lbs physically đŸ“· đŸ“· No Kids, No other animals đŸ“· all supplies will be covered by the rescue
đŸ“· even if it’s a temp foster until we can properly test him & evaluate medically, we just don’t want to take any chances bc of his size- đŸ“·IN THE SAME BREATHEđŸ“· I think he just needs out of the shelter because everyone loves him and he loves everyone that he knows and has paid their dues with đŸ“·treats đŸ“·đŸ“·
Anyone up to help us help this baby?
submitted by ProposalEcstatic3944 to rescuedogs [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 01:38 bravo_delta_bot Cardinals After Dark 6/3

Linescore 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 R H E LOB
Cardinals 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 2 0 3 6 2 7
Pirates 0 0 0 0 1 3 0 0 4 8 0 4

FINAL: 4-3 Pirates

Decisions
Postgame Wrap
Highlights
submitted by bravo_delta_bot to Cardinals [link] [comments]


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Kindle Kkimkkimmy gasd23 Lady In The Streets Lana Bee Laura Lux Lauren Jasmine LauraSahar Lauren Burch Lasirena69 Lavaxgrl Layla Brooks Layladeline Leah Larsh Lems7 Lena Kitsune Lena12 Leyna Inu Lilbussygirl Lilmochidoll Lilwaifulia Liya Perez Lily Phillips Lily Shams LillyVig Lina Belfiore Lindsay Capuano Littlespoonz Liya Silver Lolaxmina Loonassoftfeet LoveAngelica Low-keydeadinside asf Lucy Doll Lucy Mochi Lulu Chu LydiaGh0st Lynarita Lyra Crow Maddy Belle Madiitay Madisonwilde Milakitten Maikonidesvip Margot Robbie Mariaaskyy Maria del Mar Mariam Hadid Marie Temara Marisol Yotta Mary Burke Meggyeggo Mei Kou Mei Minato Meladinha Mellooow Melwood Mercedes Blanche Mia Falls Mia Monroe Michelle Rabbit Mikayla Demaiter Mikki Marie Milababy69 Mila Sobolov Minavenetavip Miss Banana Miss Bunda Miss Dxxx Miss Lexa Misstiff Model_gg Molly X Moody Feet Morgpie Morganlanexo Motzie Mvngokitty Nanda Reyes Nataliexking Natalnya Natasha Noel Naya Dickson afsd3q2 Nebraskawut Neiima Nicki Minaj Nicole Dobrikov Nikitaxkim / Nikita Cruze Nina Kayy Nnnnekochan Nonsalemwitch Norafawn Nymphet Angel Oakleyraeee Ocicat Officialzoerenea Oliviamaebae Okichloeo Olivia Eden Orphicbunny Paigeuncaged Paige Woolen Pantynectar Patricia Lopez Pengali Princess Phia Pixei Praewasian fas3 Prosexx Puppiwi P7oh7 Queen Needy Queenqawan Quinnfinite Quqco Railey Diesel Rainey James Razorbaby Realprettyangel RealSkyBri Redheadwinter Renata Riww RileyFans Romi Rain Rori Rain Rose Monroe Roxysdream SaabSilvi Saleemamansur Samantona Saucekaybaby Savana Sky Scarlett Johansson Scarlet Silva Senya Marin Shania Perrett Shinratensei98 Shycutie Siegex Sierra Cabot Skyexxxsummers Skyiiah Snaxychann Sienna Mae Gomez Skylar Blue Sofiallia Fiaax2 Safiyaax Sofia Mariana Sofia Silk Sophielaurenxxo Soogsx and Puppiwii Stella Barey Steffy Moreno Stefanie Gurzanski asfdg Steph Murves Summer Brookes Sweetie Fox Sydneymay Tahlia Hall Tanababyxo Tantot Twins Tayathegoddess TayTatted Tayylavie TheBaeBreanna Theesammyjo TheGorillaGrip Theprivateavocado Tiffanynhoe Tiny Texie Talia Mar Triplex Celeste Trippie Bri Trishyland Tru Kait Urfavbellabby Ur69baby Uwucatxoxo Valeria Vidal Vanessa.rhd Vanessa Sierra Vega Thompson Vero Gold gasfdg2 Veronica Zolotova Vismara Martina Vyvan Le Wettmelons Whoahannahjo Whosbonnieandclyde Xailormoon Xenon Xlucy Yasmine Lopez Yololary YourSuggerBaby Yoya Grey Yummy Kimmy Yur Aular Zayla Skye Zipoz fsdf13 Zusje Addison Rae Faith Ordway Emily Ratajkowsk Emma Chamberlain Dixie D'Amelio Madison Beer Erin Gilfoy danielle bregoli
submitted by Deep-Difficulty-2960 to u/Deep-Difficulty-2960 [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 10:54 emunroginn New Releases 3 June

New Releases 3 June

Kindle Unlimited
Kobo Plus
No new releases.
Other

Other Queer Romance

Kindle Unlimited
Kobo Plus
No new releases.
Other

Audiobooks

No new releases.

Free At Time of Posting (may be location-specific)

submitted by emunroginn to MM_RomanceBooks [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 04:11 bravo_delta_bot Cardinals After Dark 6/2

Linescore 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 R H E LOB
Cardinals 0 0 5 0 0 0 0 0 0 5 13 0 12
Pirates 0 0 0 0 0 1 6 0 7 11 0 9

FINAL: 7-5 Pirates

Decisions
Postgame Wrap
Highlights
submitted by bravo_delta_bot to Cardinals [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 03:09 Juice_box_studios Do u like it?

Do u like it?

bussines #cool #pitcure #editing #coolediting #shirts

submitted by Juice_box_studios to u/Juice_box_studios [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 00:17 CloudsKeepPassing Ill draw you a picture :)

Hi everyone, my name is Felix and im from the Bronx, NYC. I’m just looking for texting friends, preferably through discord.
I like cooking, healthy eating, clean and whole food / plant based eating, nature, science, working out, philosophy, animals, tv shows, movies, art, writing poetry, writing stories, novella style roleplaying, paranormal, space, and cryptozoology.
Big plus if you are interested in nyc history or are a vegan, but not required lol. I have been told im naturally paternal, even for being 19, so if that appeals to you, let me know.
Im looking for someone who would be interested in a text based online friendship. Just someone to share stuff with - or talk about interests, on a daily basis.
Full disclosure: I have autism and struggle with IRL connections but i am most comfortable with text friendships. I love to connect with people but find it very hard to do in traditional irl situations.
if it matters, though I am not necessarily looking for NSFW stuff, and would prefer an intellectual connection more than anything. But if you are curious, I am a switch verse with a dom bottom lean - but a true verse / switch. I am open minded, to put it politely, lol.
Similar to me? Total opposites? Doesn’t matter, im friendly and kind and would just like someone I can build a friendship with.
That said, your gender and sexual identity don’t matter to me, just looking for cool and interesting people who want to have a potential long term online friend. I am a nice guy and I enjoy being nice to people. I would like to form a deep connection with someone over time
As my post promised, I love to draw - though im no artist - and id love to draw you anything you’d like as a token of my friendship and sincerity. Just lower your expectations lol, I am not a great artist, just someone enjoys doing things to make others smile.
l would describe myself as kind, gentle, open minded and friendly.
If you at all feel interested, please reach out! I am latino / asian mixed so please be POC friendly, and willing to connect with all kinds of people. Again, Im looking for friendship before anything else. Don’t expect consistent photos with me, but i can show you at least what i look like if we build a friendship.
Take care, Felix
submitted by CloudsKeepPassing to gayfriendfinder [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 20:45 SelfReliantSchool [TX] [H] 150+ Graphic Novels & TPBs [W] PayPal (buy 2 get 1 free!)

Various graphic novels and trade paperbacks. All are in great shape unless noted. A picture link is after most of them; I'm still taking photos, so if there's one you're interested let me know, and I'll get a pic of it. This weekend (June 2-4) I'm doing buy 2, get 1 free! (Lowest priced one would be free) Shipping based on weight and zip code.
100 Greatest Marvels of All Time: #13-10 - $2 - https://imgur.com/rNewcTM
100 Greatest Marvels of All Time: #17-14 - $2 (sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/2FnhlPE
100 Greatest Marvels of All Time: #9-6 - $2 (sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/z4E5O4V
30 Days of Night - $3 - $3 - https://imgur.com/CJB1GGQ
Amazing Spider-Man: 24/7 - $6 - https://imgur.com/jT9twsa
Amazing Spider-Man: American Son - $6 - https://imgur.com/HmIiOgP
Amazing Spider-Man: Animal Magnetism - $6 - https://imgur.com/3lnIZLk
Amazing Spider-Man: Brand New Day Complete Collection Vol. 1 - $40 - https://imgur.com/A3clBf8
Amazing Spider-Man: Brand New Day Complete Collection Vol. 2 - $35 - https://imgur.com/di9xX6T
Amazing Spider-Man: Death And Dating - $6 - https://imgur.com/L1adKnF
Amazing Spider-Man: Died In Your Arms Tonight - $7 - https://imgur.com/00QFmdN
Amazing Spider-Man: Happy Birthday - $3 (wrinkled) - https://imgur.com/nwIh2DW
Amazing Spider-Man: Sins Past - $7 - https://imgur.com/4GboUoP
Amazing Spider-Man: Skin Deep - $5 - https://imgur.com/7U7RTCB
Amazing Spider-Man: Soul of the Hunter - $3 - https://imgur.com/cOwEGNm
Amazing Spider-Man: The Gauntlet Vol. 1 Electro & Sandman (HC) - $8 - https://imgur.com/0jb6cfx
Amazing Spider-Man: The Gauntlet Vol. 3 Vulture & Morbius (HC) - $8 - https://imgur.com/xTPStET
Amazing Spider-Man: Unintended Consequences - $5 - https://imgur.com/0nPH7Yp
Angel: After The Fall Vol. 1 - $10 (HC) -
Avengers / Defenders War - $3 -
BatGirl New 52 Vol. 1: The Darkest Reflection - $6 - https://imgur.com/KOH1m5W
Batman Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on Serious Earth - $9 - https://imgur.com/RCvzrmS
Batman New 52 Vol. 1 The Court of Owls - $7 - https://imgur.com/JLHQVgn
Batman New 52 Vol. 10: Epilogue - $5 (HC, price sticker) - https://imgur.com/upqdfYt
Batman New 52 Vol. 8: Superheavy - $7 (HC) - https://imgur.com/4BHcXXK
Batman White Knight - $10 - https://imgur.com/DQZIqJk
Batman Year One - $6 - https://imgur.com/RabKR4H
Batman: Knightfall Vol. 1 & 2 (sold as set) - $20 - https://imgur.com/3cwlOD7 https://imgur.com/p22J3S3
Batman: The Dark Knight Returns - $8 - https://imgur.com/IWPpn2q
Batman: The Killing Joke Deluxe Edition - $9 (HC) - https://imgur.com/UhkEiHZ
Black Panther: Who is the Black Panther? - $5 - https://imgur.com/teJvWTj
Black The Birth of Evil Book 1 - $2 -
Black Widow: Kiss or Kill - $4 - https://imgur.com/qJ3I97S
Black Widow: Last Days - $5 - https://imgur.com/eRNhfGG
Black Widow: The Tightly Tangled Web - $7 - https://imgur.com/V2BqYaV
Buck Rogers Vol. 1: Future Shock - $3 -
Camelot 3000 Deluxe Edition - $8 (HC, ex-library, 2 stickers on DJ) - https://imgur.com/avwuHtK
Captain America Corps - $5 - https://imgur.com/QWrw958
Captain America: Man & Wolf - $15 -
Captain America: The Legacy of Captain America - $7 -
Captain America: The Trial of Captain America - $8 -
Carnage: The One That Got Away - $4 - https://imgur.com/1Xj46Mx
Civil War - $5 (minor water damage) - https://imgur.com/rm72NpD
Civil War: Fantastic Four - $5 - https://imgur.com/OI9yDOE
Daredevil and The Punisher: Child's Play - $6 - https://imgur.com/HlirjI9
Deadpool Vol. 1 - $10 (HC, dj has minor wrinkles) - https://imgur.com/Uy822b6
Death of Superman - $5 - https://imgur.com/s5PIffB
Deathlok: The Demolisher - $4 - https://imgur.com/hQQyVEc
Dracula: The Company of Monsters Vol. 1-3 (set of 3) - $7 -
Earth 2 Vol. 1 The Gathering - $4 - https://imgur.com/zNVON2s
Empire of the Dead - $4 - https://imgur.com/eXh325C
Essential Amazing Spider-Man Vol. 1 - $14 - https://imgur.com/qAucQxB
Essential Amazing Spider-Man Vol. 2 - $14 - https://imgur.com/dlwcuze
Essential Amazing Spider-Man Vol. 3 - $14 - https://imgur.com/7WxTIXA
Essential Amazing Spider-Man Vol. 4 - $14 - https://imgur.com/Sni33aq
Essential Amazing Spider-Man Vol. 5 - $14 - https://imgur.com/8Kc9xuZ
Essential Spectacular Spider-Man Vol. 1 - $14 - https://imgur.com/DtiqSuv
Essential Spectacular Spider-Man Vol. 2 - $14 - https://imgur.com/ONsWarr
Ex Machina Vol. 1: The First Hundred Days - $3 -
Fanboys vs. Zombies 1-5 (set of 5) - $10 -
Fantastic Four Ultimate Collection Book 1 - $8 - https://imgur.com/PejerKZ
Farscape Uncharted Tales: D'Argo's Lament - $3 (HC) - *--
Farscape Uncharted Tales: D'Argo's Quest - $3 - https://imgur.com/Vzx8vSC
Farscape: Strange Detractors - $3 (HC) - https://imgur.com/xmF0rh6
Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man: Derailed - $5 - https://imgur.com/Fd8qzp2
Greatest Superman Stories Ever Told - $5 - https://imgur.com/L7JGeXD
Green Lantern: Traitor - $4 - https://imgur.com/bTYYNGo
Grimm Fairy Tales: The Piper - $3 -
Gwandanaland #2369 - Skywald's Nightmare Vol. 1 - $10 - https://imgur.com/CRBb3tf
Gwandanaland Monster Series 17 Classic Castle of Frankenstein Vol. 7 - $6 - https://imgur.com/E0vqv4O
Harleen - $15 (HC) - https://imgur.com/Xijtmvx
Harvey Horrors Witches Tales Vol. 3 - $6 - https://imgur.com/HZbVLfm
Harvey Horrors Witches Tales Vol. 4 - $6 - https://imgur.com/yiMXuD3
Heroes Vol. 1 - $5 (HC) - https://imgur.com/eY9T9Gw
Heroes Vol. 2 - $5 (HC) - https://imgur.com/pgN8mkX
Incorruptible Vol. 1 - $2 -
Incorruptible Vol. 2 - $2 -
Infinity Gauntlet - $15 - https://imgur.com/BESwkQA
Injustice Gods Among Us Vol. 1 (HC) - $5 - https://imgur.com/YCQHhYB
Injustice Gods Among Us Vol. 2 (HC) - $5 - https://imgur.com/wLeuCMl
Invincible Iron Man Vol. 2 - $15 (HC, still shrinkwrapped) - https://imgur.com/eKkLcpp
John Woo's 7 Brothers Omnibus Vol. 1 - $4 - https://imgur.com/4qhb001
Lazarus Vol. 1 - $2 -
Legends of the Dark Knight Vol. 3 Jim Aparo (HC) - $15 (HC) - https://imgur.com/M5VRtek
Low Vol 1: The Delerium of Hope - $4 (tear in cover and first few pages) -
Marvel 1602 - $8 - https://imgur.com/FPZn0gb
Marvel Zombies - $5 - https://imgur.com/MVFHFOf
Marvel Zombies Christmas Carol - $4 (HC) - https://imgur.com/P1ngbBU
Marvel Zombies: Battleworld - $3 - https://imgur.com/xutylJL
Marvels - $5 - https://imgur.com/IBxSFim
Neil Gaiman's Lady Justice Vol. 1 - $3 -
Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe A to Z Vol. 2 - $4 -
Planet of the Apes Vol. 1: The Long War - $3 -
Planet of the Apes Vol. 3: Cataclysm - $3 -
Planet of the Apes Vol. 4: The Half Man - $3 - /
Prelude to Infinite Crisis - $3 (price sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/yoQhEbW
Raise The Dead - $5 (HC) - https://imgur.com/PGBblng
Red Hulk: Planet Red Hulk - $8 -
Red Hulk: Scorched Earth - $8 -
She Hulks: Hunt for the Intelligencia - $5 - https://imgur.com/UsseE8N
Snowpiercer: The Escape - $5 - https://imgur.com/1UsrgyO
Spawn Book 1 - $5 -
Speed Racer: Official 30th Anniversary Guide - $3 - https://imgur.com/4bHISfx
Spider-Man The Next Chapter vol. 1 - $10 - https://imgur.com/jrtwlV6
Spider-Man: The Other Evolve or Die - $10 - https://imgur.com/KtMBkb4
Spread Vol. 1: No Hope - $4 -
Star Wars Vol. 1: Skywalker Strikes - $5 - https://imgur.com/CFELhgG
Star Wars Vol. 4: Last Flight of the Harbinger - $5 - https://imgur.com/CPJ3CfX
Superman: Speeding Bullets - $4 (shelf wear) - https://imgur.com/39T04DV
The Curse of Dracula - $3 -
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Vol. 1 - $6 -
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Century 1910 - $4 -
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Century 2009 - $4 -
The Life Eaters - $4 (HC) -
The Magdalena Vol. 1 - $2 -
The Magdalena Vol. 2 - $2 -
The Magdalena: Blood Divine - $2 -
The Thing Classic Vol. 1 - $9 - https://imgur.com/lBxq8do
The Twilight Zone Vol. 1: The Way Out - $3 -
The Twilight Zone Vol. 2: The Way In - $3 -
The Visitor: How & Why He Stayed - $3 -
The Waking - $2 -
The Waking: Dreams End - $2 -
The Walking Dead Compendium Two - $15 - https://imgur.com/8TvZthy
Tom Corbett Space Cadet Vol. 1 (HC) - $10 (HC) - https://imgur.com/fVNVPEq
Tom Corbett Space Cadet Vol. 2 (HC) - $10 (HC) - https://imgur.com/yuEMMk9
Trick 'r Treat: Days of the Dead - $3 - /-+
Tron: Original Movie Adaptation - $10 -
Ultimate Annuals Vol. 2 - $3 (price sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/o92IX6W
Ultimate Avengers vs. New Ultimates: Death of Spider-Man - $6 - https://imgur.com/acGohIA
Ultimate Comics Avengers: Blade vs. The Avengers - $4 - https://imgur.com/jpmYEKN
Ultimate Comics Hawkeye - $3 (price sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/Nkm46nD
Ultimate Comics Thor - $3 - https://imgur.com/rScJJqO
Ultimate Galactus Vol. 1 - 3 (set of 3) - $10 - https://imgur.com/B9nrZYl
Ultimate Spiderman 1: Power and Responsibility - $5 (some edge wear) - https://imgur.com/sX539fM
Ultimate Spiderman 10: Hollywood - $8 - https://imgur.com/aAQou85
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 1: The Tomorrow People - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 12: Hard Lessons - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 14: Phoenix? - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 16: Cable - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 2: Return to Weapon X - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 7: Blockbuster - $3 -
Ultimate X-Men Vol. 8: New Mutants - $3 -
Ultimates 2 Vol. 1: Gods & Monsters - $2 (price sticker on cover) - https://imgur.com/GPuQe8D
Wolverine: Blood Debt - $3 - https://imgur.com/nezZNAX
Wolverine: Logan - $4 (wrinkle on top edge) - https://imgur.com/JyFHIzI
Wolverine: Old Man Logan - $6 - https://imgur.com/96xOeki
Wolverine: Origins & Endings - $6 - https://imgur.com/2GzKdLW
Wolverine: The Reckoning - $10 - https://imgur.com/fOsgqlQ
Wytches Vol. 1 - $5 - https://imgur.com/rJ1ZEo2
submitted by SelfReliantSchool to comicswap [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 19:43 tulpacat1 To Kill a Predator, Chapter 22

Hi everyone.
To Kill a Predator is a work of fan fiction set in the Nature of Predators universe originally created by SpacePaladin15 whose Patreon you should subscribe to.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Depiction does not equal endorsement.
Hope you enjoy it!
[First] [Previous]
---
Memory transcription subject: Jarkim, Unemployed Krakotl
Date [standardized human time]: November 30th, 2136

If they were following standard procedure, they’d be storing munitions separate from personnel and weapons. In guild offices there were hermetically sealed rooms for it, ensuring any stray fires would be snuffed out as soon as they devoured all the oxygen.
In a place like this, my bet was one of the sheds or root cellars. I had sent Russo and Mosun to handle the garage and workers’ quarters.
Of course it was possible they hadn’t got enough fuel, ammo, and explosives to prosecute their campaign. Possible, but unlikely. The attack on the shelter hadn’t been the actions of a group running on fumes.
Honestly, if I were in their position I’d hole up here too. A large farm makes sense. They’d have phosphorous, ammonium nitrate, local stores of benzene or fuel oils, ipsom grain to make into powder, even the septic tanks if you’re really desperate
 there’s more ways to create fire bombs at your average farm than I can be bothered to count.
I ran the math in my head. I didn’t like the result I got: the Liberators probably had enough fire to turn every human in the district into ash several times over, and they might still have enough left over for everyone who voted for Tarva too.
I approached the first shed with Slavik. It was one of the simple above-ground ones. Unlikely target to bear fruit, in my mind, but it was the closest. “I’ll go in first. You watch out with the rifle.”
They nodded at me, grimly.
The door opened and I rushed into the darkness.

“It’ll be the fourth.”
“Why’s that?”
“Four’s a lucky number.”
“No it’s not.”
“Sure it is. If you have to count past it, you have to use a second paw.”
The first shed had been empty but for tools. The second had held spare parts for their generators. The third had led to a root cellar full of sun-dried and salted fruit, and some jars of preserves.
Lucky number four was a steel door surrounded by concrete inset into the ground, and as soon as it was wrenched open the stench of chemicals assaulted me. Even Slavik coughed with distaste, and they didn’t have a nose.
“Well Slavik, turns out you were right.”
“That
 does not taste lucky.”
“It doesn’t, does it. Alright, let’s go.”
I moved in. Slavik was right behind me. We headed into the gloom, slowly waiting for our eyes to adjust. Slavik muttered a bit before turning on the light attached to their rifle. They swiveled their entire torso back and forth, eyes focused on the rifle sights.
Industrial tanks of chemicals stood like forlorn monsters in the dark, the threadbare light by the rifle’s muzzle casting ugly and stark shadows.
“Never should’ve come here.”
I froze. The voice was coming from behind me
 and to the left.

There was a second Venlil, lunging out from behind one of the tanks with a breaching tool held in both paws. He struck Slavik’s gun, and I heard the weapon hit the stone floor somewhere in the dark. With a second swing he caught Slavik across the head, and they went down hard.
I lunged at him, talons grasping for purchase in the short Exterminator-cut fur of the assailant. I got a good digging grip and pulled him back, raking grooves in his shoulders in the process and sending the crowbar clattering into the shadows.
I recognized him as Vilrak, and he screamed with anger and pain and managed to strike me in the eye with his elbow. I reeled back, squawking, when his paw struck me in the stomach. Pain blossomed and spread like fire. His claws were outstretched, and dug in under the feathers and tore skin.
In response I lashed out with a talon, tearing bloody gouges in his snout. Venlil snouts are sturdy and solid bone, and I did little actual damage. It was still enough to send him back with a yelp.
We both caught our breaths, blood dripping from claw and talon alike.
Slavik was on the ground. They weren’t moving.

“Vilrak, it’s over
 Stand down.”
His voice was filled with loathing. “
Jarkim. So Karta failed to get rid of you, you traitorous piece of-”
I interjected immediately. “What you’re doing here isn’t going to work.”
“Oh, but it is. We’re going to bring Venlil Prime back to sanity, and back into the Federation.”
“There’s no going back. The Interview, the humans, the proof that even the Arxur can be bargained with after they returned their Venlil cattle
 The galaxy’s a different place than it was just a cycle ago.”
“So what?”
I plead with him to turn from his path. When he realized and accepted the situation, he’d do the right thing. Just like I had. “We’re going to have to learn to live in the new world. One that doesn’t need us. We believed our job was necessary
 We were only acting on
 On the information we had, the information we were given. But we were wrong. Listen to me, Vilrak. There’s another path here. We can reform the Exterminators. We can make it into something better, something that serves the community.”
He straightened up and lashed his tail at me, turning and walking away. One eye was locked on me the entire time. “Oh you stupid, sanctimonious fuck. You’re the only one who ever believed any of that predshit.”
I paused. “
What?”

He walked slowly. I followed, staying at a careful distance. “Being an Exterminator was the perfect job. We had respect. We had power, Jarkim! You’re the only one who didn’t seem to realize that! Oh, you useless damn joke of a Krakotl
 You turned your beak and curled your talons every time you had to pull the trigger, and always made sure the PDs came in without a fight. The rest of us loved it!”
I felt sick. I had never liked Vilrak, but this was
 Like Vikar, and Renak, and Luarik, and Karta, and
 Not unprecedented. But hearing it put in such stark terms

“I always hated rolling out with you, because you’re too insufferably straight-laced. The rest of the guys understood the opportunities. But not you, oh no. As soon as you get in the van the fun stops. No taking money to make PD cases go away, no letting off steam with the rods and some drunk, no sharing cuties collared in the back of the van
”
My talons itched to tear out his evil fucking throat. But more than that, I wanted to tear down the entire system I had been complicit in. I had looked the other way, made sure to not ask awkward questions I didn’t want the answers to. And that made me one link in the chain. The facilities, the prosecutors, the assessors, they were all working with the Exterminators. Everyone knew that we were the only way they’d stay safe, the firebreak between the civilians and the predators. So they let us do whatever we wanted.
“Vilrak
 It’s not going to stay that way anymore. It can’t. It mustn’t. The winds are changing. If everyone’s as
 sick and twisted as you, and the Exterminators can’t be reformed? Then we’ll be abolished instead.”
“That’s right, because the humans are fucking it all up! They did more for Venlilkind in one paw than we Exterminators have done since we joined the Federation, just by sharing food with the greys! And now everyone knows it!”
“Exactly. There’s no going back.”
“Yeah, well. It’s worth a shot.”
When he turned to face me again he was holding a flamethrower, the tank under one arm and the nozzle under the other. In the darkness I only realized he was firing when it spewed incendiary death in a wide arc.

I had to gracelessly take flight, leaping back and thrashing with my wings to get behind one of the chemical tanks in time. I ended up smashing into the wall for my trouble, and I felt something in my wing snap.
But seeing the burning trail where I had stood a blink of an eye beforehand, it was still a worthwhile trade-off.
Other than what little light the fires gave off, and the light from the open door, the room was dark. The flashlight on Slavik’s gun had gone out.
I slowly crept around the tank
 step by step. Listening for the Venlil’s footsteps, and hearing nothing.
I heard the sound of the tank shifting nearby, and froze in place. I held my breath.
He was speaking from just a couple of wingspans away, in the dark. “You’re not the first predator I’ve had to hunt. And you’re not gonna be the last.”
There was a click as the flamethrower’s ignition line turned on.
A line of fire spewed from the muzzle, sending me scrambling for cover again. I needn’t have bothered, he wasn’t aiming at me.
With the second line of burning fuel gel, he created a ‘V’ shape against the wall. He was simply boxing me in, cutting off my escape. Standard procedure when dealing with poor-visibility terrain.
Now all he had to do was hose the enclosed area, and that would be it.
I felt panic slowly begin to flood my brain, and forced it down. I couldn’t let myself become an animal. He knew how to burn animals.

Gotta get out of here, or I’m kindling.
With only one working wing, I was rapidly running out of options. When Vilrak spewed another gout of flame, my options dwindled further. I took flight, my one wing fluttering as I twisted my body in a desperate attempt to get above the flames and the equally dangerous super-heated air right above them. I felt the oppressive heat and could imagine my feathers curl and blacken as I made my desperate lunge over the fire-wall.
My talons scraped the stone loudly upon my rough landing, and I ended up falling prone. I yelled out as I landed on my bad wing again.
Starting to rise slowly, far too slowly, I heard Vilrak whistle out a laugh from nearby. I saw his shadowed form looming out of the dark, lit from the side by the growing flames. The flamethrower’s ignition line clicking on. Faced straight at me.
There was a bright, sudden light. And a scream.

Vilrak reeled back. So did I, good wing raised in a meaningless gesture of defense. I couldn’t see anything, blinded by Slavik’s flashlight. I heard a shout. “Jarkim, get down!”
I laid myself prone on the ground without hesitation.
KRAK-Ow
Superheated plasma flew overhead, sizzling the air and filling the enclosed space with the rank stench of ozone.
The shot impacted Vilrak’s fuel tank. The ensuing breach sent burning fuel and bits of hot metal all over the cellar, and threw him back into the wall. With my head down I could do nothing but flinch and hope.
A searing lance of pain impacted my leg, making me squawk out. A glance down showed a piece of jagged metal the size of a wing feather sticking out of my thigh.
Blinking the spots out of my eyes and coughing from the smoke filling the room, I saw Slavik holding the plasma rifle. It was aimed at the prone Exterminator, who was already screaming and crawling. His legs were on fire, and looked shredded from shrapnel. The flames were eagerly eating their way up his short-cut fur, already spreading up over his back and sides. His voice was a high-pitched, babbling shriek.
All that confidence, bravado, and gleeful sadism had vanished the instant it was his turn. And I wasn’t a good enough person to not take some vindictive joy in that.
“Not the flames not the flames please not the flames!! No no no nono please please not the flames!! Help meeeeee!!!”
KRAK-Ow
The second shot took him in the face. I looked away sharply, not interested in seeing the results.

“C’mon, you useless lump. Move your ass before it’s cooked.” Slavik grabbed me by my good wing, dragged me out of the burning cellar like a sack of grain, and closed the door behind us.
The fire would eat through all the oxygen long before it burst any of the chemical tanks. Even so, Slavik didn’t stop dragging me until we were a good distance away and we could both collapse in a panting heap on the ground.
Slavik’s head was leaking orange blood into their wool from the hit, and an ugly lump was already forming on their head. They looked at me darkly. “
That was mercy. I’m not going to let myself become the kind of person who’d have let him burn.”
I felt jolts of pain searing through my body each time I coughed. “Khakh, Khahhk
 Y-You just saved my life. You don’t have to justify yourself to me.”
They looked down at their weapon in silence for a while, before speaking so quietly that I barely heard it. “You’re not the one I’m trying to convince.”
After a long silence, I tried my arm and grimaced. My leg refused to even bend now that the adrenaline was flushing out, and I didn’t want to take the metal out in case it was sitting in an artery. I didn’t even want to know what my feathers looked like. “
Wing’s busted. L-Leg too. I’m no good like this. Khahhk
 I’ll head back, you try to link up with the other team.”
Slavik shouldered the rifle, and lifted me up. “After I get you back to Hanya.”
The trek back was awkward, and slow. I was left to hop and cling to Slavik as they half-dragged me along. I hoped the other team was having more success.
---
Memory transcription subject: Martin Russo, Human Refugee
Date [standardized human time]: November 30th, 2136

I raise my hand to Mosun. Three. Two. One.
The door opens. Mosun lunges in low, I sweep in high.
Nothing greets us but silence. We sweep the ground floor of the main house slowly, room by room. I move my aim back and forth like a metronome as I seek targets. My eyes dart around from place to place. Those saccades the Venlil are so afraid of.
The place shows clear signs of being lived in. Very recently. There are still-damp dishes in the kitchen.
The living room is an even bigger tell. On the table there’s a map of the whole district, and another of the town. Addresses are circled in different colors. I might not have recognized the map so quickly, except I’ve also been studying up for my own campaign.
As we search the place it appears that nobody’s home. They seem to have removed all the signs of the original inhabitants. I see pale reverse-shadows on the wall where once hung pictures or pieces of art.
I tap Mosun’s shoulder. He looks at me, and I point up, then down, and give a shrug. Upstairs or basement first?
As Mosun considers the question, we hear a scream. I freeze stock still, and Mosun’s eyes go wide. It’s from upstairs.

I brave a soft voice. “
Is that
”
Another scream. A word carries through the drawn out, inelegant blubbering. “Mhh-aaa-aahhhahhhu-hurttii-hi-hiiinnnn!!” My blood feels ice cold, and my stomach drops out.
Jesus Christ it’s my name. She’s screaming my name.
I’m acutely aware my tongue is dry.
Another scream, this time just a shrill sound of pain.
I’m running up the stairs. My grip on the gun is so tight it hurts. For a few seconds my thoughts don’t form words, just the panicked urge to rush to my beloved friend. To help and defend her.
Upstairs there are four rooms. Two on the left, one on the right, and one in the far back. The only one that matters is the one with the noise.
I rush to the door and almost wrench it open right away, but pause.
Stay frosty.
Mosun almost runs into me in his haste to keep up.
I turn and look at him. His furious face mirrors mine. I cringe as another shout comes from the room right beside us.
He nods grimly and grabs the door handle. We both take a couple of deep, steadying breaths.
I raise my hand to Mosun. Three. Two. One.
---
Here's some fun fanart of Martin's Ghost Gun by Asclepius on the discord, thanks Asclepius!
https://imgur.com/a/zpJf1S9
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submitted by tulpacat1 to NatureofPredators [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 17:47 Swimming-Toe-8050 AITA for still holding on to what my parents did to the past?

I (26f) grew up in a very controlling environment. It was so bad that I wasn't able to have friends, and on most days I struggle to stand up for myself. I had a choice on pretty much nothing and it was almost bordering on abusive.
I think the best way to explain it is by just giving some examples of what happened.
  1. My mother would read and monitor all my messages until I was 24. There were times when she would even call me while I was at class to get mad at me over something that one of my friends said on chat. She would yell at me because a friend would tell me a secret of theirs (usually involving their intimate life) that she disapproved of.
When I was in a very controlling and abusive romantic relationship, I would try to find comfort by talking to my best friend. She would intercept our messages and would call me in the middle of class saying that she was going to reply to him telling him that everything was OK (she genuinely did not know my boyfriend was abusive and controlling).
When I got into a very traumatic event that she knew about, I wasn't able to talk to my best friend about it and seek comfort because she already told him her version of events through my account, and I couldn't tell him twice.
  1. She would post pictures of me without my consent on my personal page, with captions that I myself would have never thought of or dreamed of writing. Think the most boomer level shit like "they said I'm SOOOOO tall!" (Who the fuck says that?!) . Whenever I confronted her and asked her to stop, she would say I'm suffocating her and being ungrateful. She knew I wanted to be a star, and she said I could never be a star because of how I was reacting to her posting pictures of me that I did not like (they were unflattering and very grainy). It got to the point where I was being made fun of at school because of such bad photos and bad captions, but she did not stop. When I told her about the bullying, she would just say that I was making up stories or to just not mind them. People genuinely thought that I was the person she made me out to be on social media, cringe captions and all, and of course nobody wanted to associate with me because "I" was so cringey, stuck up, and judgemental.
  2. When I was in elementary school, we were asked to write a report on any country of our choice. I was heavy into Egyptian culture at the time, and I was excited to write a report on Egypt. She refused to let me do it and demanded I write it on France. I tried to stand up for myself by doing it on Egypt anyway, but she made a report on France and made me turn it in. She even talked to the teachers after to be sure I gave the France report and not the Egypt report. When I was asked to write an on the spot essay a few weeks later, I made it on Egypt, not France. She got mad at me for that.
  3. She insisted that I stay within campus grounds at all times when I was in college. She would call me at random times to be sure I was not going elsewhere, and demand video call. Sometimes, she'd call in class. Several times, she called during exams. She would then get mad at me for not picking it up and making her call security. When I told her I was having exams, she would get mad at me for getting mad at her because she did not know (even if I told her???).
  4. If I wasn't picking up calls, she would call campus security to look for me and would not stop until they found me. There have been lots of situations where security got involved and bothered, but really I was just sleeping or taking an exam. It got to the point that I was always anxious and paranoid about my every move.
  5. I wasn't allowed to be in study sessions. I took a very difficult course in college, and so I needed help. Sometimes my classmates would hold study groups in preparation for midterms or finals. These groups would last past 12 MN, since classes sometimes end at 6 pm or even 8 pm.lIf she found out I was in this group and not in my dorm, she would call me, yell at me, and get security involved until I was back in my dorm, the exam be damned. Her reason for never letting me go out was because I took a difficult course and needed to focus, but she didn't let me get the help I needed for that course either.
  6. I had to give up the sport I loved to be a dancer. I had a sport I was taking up behind her back. Without going into too much detail, she considered it too masculine. But I was good at it. I was so good that they wanted to train me to enter the National Team and compete internationally. She pulled me out of the team and made me join a dance group I hated. I eventually got a leadership role in that group, and managed to get us a public performance. On the first public performance, I was starting to accept being a dancer. I was starting to feel happy in that field. While I was on cloud 9 on success, she pulled me aside and told me to quit the group because she was unhappy with the performance.
  7. Let's talk about that leadership role. For once, I though I had some control and power in a group. I tried hard to be a good leader. However, she would take control of the social media accounts and post things without my consent on to the social media accounts of the group. Other members were upset (rightfully so), and when I asked her to stop, she would say that the other members were terrible, didn't know what they were doing, and too young to know any better. She was older so what she was doing was right.
  8. You may ask where my father is in all of this. Whenever my mom and I would fight, I would raise my voice on purpose so my dad in the next room would hear me. I wanted him to save me. He never came. I thought it was because he was hard of hearing, but he admitted years later that he knew what was happening, but wanted me to face my own battles. I was a child. How do you expect an 8 year old to stand up to her mother?
However, he would get involved if I got disrespectful. He wanted me to face my own battles, but when I stood up for myself, he would punish me.
That's just some of the things they put me through. Because of all that, I wasn't able to get forward very successfully in life. I barely got my degree. I wasn't allowed to socialize, so I had very few friends and lots of social anxiety. I wasn't able to get a good paying job, so I can't afford a place of my own unlike my friends. I'm mentally and socially behind my peers.
When I was 25, I had a major breakdown that made them start getting more lax on me. I threatened to kill myself if they didn't change their ways. My mom relinquished control of my social media and started letting me go out whenever I want to. They actually started changing so we can fix our relationship.
Despite that, it still hurts. I get flashbacks of what I went through from the most random shit. Last night, I saw a video of the dance I used to do and had another breakdown.
My mom thinks I should let go of the past because she's changed. I explained that even if she's changed, it still hurts. She says that I'm making much ado about nothing because the past can't be changed, but she's trying to make it up to me. She also reminds me that she did so much to take care of me as a baby, including having to pull my own shit out because I couldn't poop normally. I'm being ungrateful for remembering only the bad times and not the good times.
I've always felt that my best friend, who was the only person to comfort me whenever everything was happening, was the only one I had on my side. She reminds me that she, as my mother, is really the only person on my side because she's the only one who stayed this long and sacrificed so much for me.
Am I the asshole for still holding her sins against her? Or am I being a problematic person for clinging to the past and not being able to move forward?
My mom keeps telling me that I should be stronger than that, that the mind is a powerful thing that can break past the pain, but I'm just refusing to move on.
EDIT: I can't go non contact yet because I still live with her and sleep in the same room as her. She's beside me as I type this. This is because I don't have enough savings yet to move out (her controlling didn't allow me to earn or hold down a job, and I've given up opportunities because she didn't allow me to take them). But the moment I have enough saved, I'm out. I don't want to go to a shelter either or go on government support because I recognize that other people have bigger problems than me and I'm still more privileged than a lot of other people. It feels wrong to take funding and space away from people who actually need it more. I don't think I'd be able to sleep at night if I knew someone else with bigger problems was suffering because I took their spot.
Update: I just want to clarify this so that everyone gets the full story. I still sleep in the same room as my mom because the spare room that I can move into is still a mess (it turned into a storage room over the years), and I'm still in the process of cleaning it out and turning it into an inhabitable space for myself. Ever since I threatened to kill myself, my parents have allowed me to drive and get my license, allowed me to get a job, allowed me to go out, and even allowed me to party.
Additional question: She's been begging me to go to therapy for a year now. Should I accept it? I'm worried that accepting their offer to pay for my therapy and possible medication ties me down more to them. I also feel most of my issues will disappear if I just move out.
Addendum: the situation for therapy, if I accept is: I go to a therapist of my choosing at my own schedule, and they will pay for it.
submitted by Swimming-Toe-8050 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 17:16 furmomofhundredpaws Just visited the dog pound this morning

Grabe lang! 5 days lang pala ang binibigay na grace period sa mga asong nahuli. If walang nag-claim sa kanila or if they don't get adopted, the pound will put them down once that grace period is up. Regardless if healthy or rehomeable yung dog.
Not sure lang sa time frame ng ibang pound, I heard sa iba umaabot ng 1 year.
Yung mga asong nahuhuli, naghihintay na lang na maipa-euthanize if walang mag-adopt.
Karamihan sa mga aso dun, nahuhuli sa kalsada. Pero marami rin na sinurrender ng mga owner nila because they don't want them anymore, because they're old, ill, deaf, have cataracts, or just bad teeth, or lumps and bumps, which might be cancer, and the owners can't afford the tests, or don't want to pay for them kaya their last resort is to surrender their dogs sa pound. It's so sad, really.
Though legal naman for the city pound to euthanize unclaimed animals after the holding period, pero nakakalungkot pa rin kung iisipin.
Kapag pupunta ka palang dog pound dapat ready ka emotionally, kasi sobrang heartbreaking if you know you can't save them all. Ang sakit sa puso makita yung mga mata nilang parang nagmamakaawa. (If you are a pet lover, you'll understand me. If not, you might think I'm being overly dramatic, but that's okay.)
Birthday ko tomorrow and decided to celebrate it na lang sa pound. Will try my best na makapag-rescue ng dogs, makahanap ng potential adopters. Ready na ulit ako masaktan bukas, hay.
Hay, I'm sad. Please please adopt, don't shop. Ang daming dogs waiting to be adopted.
Pagod na pagod na ko sa mga comments na puro "UP". Ganun siguro talaga kapag aspin noh?
Kapag may breed, naguunahan. Kaya naman pala mag-adopt, pero dapat may breed.
Kung milyonaryo lang ako, I would run a shelter, kaso hindi eh. Empleyado lang ako with a 5 digit-income. Pera ko napupunta lang sa pagpapa-kapon ng mga stray dogs and cats, pambayad sa vet ng mga asong nasagasaan.
Baka kaya hindi rin ako yumayaman. Wala eh, ito na siguro talaga calling ko... ang masaktan.
If may kakayahan kayong mag-adopt, please adopt. You can also send me a DM if you're interested. I will shoulder the pet transpo. Kung kakayanin ko, sasagutin ko na rin pagpapa-kapon.
submitted by furmomofhundredpaws to OffMyChestPH [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 16:35 ProvenStrange The Ultimate Disguise

I’m not sure if this is the right place to be posting this, but I don’t know where else to go for help. I know that after I describe the events that just happened, the ones involved may come looking for me. I have decided it’s worth the risk though. I’m still pretty shaken up, but I’m going to do my best to recall everything exactly as it happened. If something similar has happened to you or anyone you know, and you could advise me what to do next, I would really appreciate it. It might actually save my life.
Last night wasn’t the first time I had been woken up by a sound coming from the wall behind my bed. It sounded like something LARGE and HEAVY sliding along the other side of the wall. It was especially odd, because I didn’t think there was anything on the other side of that wall. I thought I had heard it several nights before this one, but was never certain if I had dreamt it or not. This time though, I knew I was awake. I was lying in bed next to my husband, Jason. I had my eyes closed, while trying to fall asleep. I couldn’t stop thinking about the fight Jason and I had a couple hours before. He told me in the five years we had been married, he had never seen me like this— a complete shell of the person I once was. He told me that I had let my paranoia completely consume me. I could tell he was deeply concerned, but also frustrated with my lack of effort to dispel it. I knew that even if I was honest about what I was worrying about though, he would not understand.
I slowly sat up in bed, straining to listen for another sound. Maybe it was some kind of animal? It sounded much too large to be a raccoon though, and bears are not common in our area. As I slowly leaned in closer to the wall, my heart jolted as I heard a very loud, THUMP THUMP. It sounded like a deliberate pounding on the other side of the wall, almost as if it was trying to get my attention.
In a low whisper, I immediately called out to Jason as he slept next to me. How could he have slept through that? He didn’t even stir, so I called his name again and tried touching his shoulder. He continued to sleep like a baby. I was about to call his name one more time when I remembered that my paranoia was the main reason for our fight earlier. Would he even believe me? I sat in the dark for a few more minutes before deciding to get up and investigate myself.
As I made my way downstairs, I caught a glimpse of a photo of the two of us from our honeymoon. Although it was from only five years ago, Jason and I looked so much younger. It was probably due to the fact that we were smiling so big. I have been trying so hard to be that happy girl in the photo for him and for me, but recently, I haven’t even come close.
I decided to start my investigation of the mysterious sound with the garage, since it is located directly under our bedroom. I flipped the light on and scanned the room from wall to wall, looking for anything out of the ordinary. Everything looked the way it was supposed to. Our car was parked out on the street that night, so the garage was just a large, echoey room. Gardening tools, storage containers, cleaning supples and various pieces of sporting equipment packed the shelves along the far wall. There was also a small stockpile of food and water Jason liked to keep just in case of a disaster. Remember, being paranoid is my thing though

I made my way over to the shelves to see if anything could have made a noise like the one I heard. As I was halfway across the garage, I heard a loud SLAM come from above me. My eyes darted up to the attic door in the ceiling and the pull string that dangled from it. The string was slowly swaying from left to right.
Great. That’s normal, right? I never realized that our bedroom shared a wall with the attic until now. I thought hard about running upstairs to get Jason’s help. That would be the most logical thing to do, but just as I was about to do that, I had this feeling. I had a very faint idea of what could be the source of the disturbance, but knew that it would defy logic. I also knew that based on the five weeks we had been together, if there was even the slightest chance that my suspicion was correct about the source of the noise, Jason would not understand— nor would he even be willing to help me deal with it. If I was going to be able to protect the both of us, I knew I had to deal with this myself.
I walked over to the attic door and grabbed the pull string. With a loud CREEEAAAAK the door slowly swung down. I grabbed the ladder attached to the door and unfolded it down to the ground. I directed my attention back up to the ceiling, and stared into the black hole that was the attic entrance.
My eyes strained to make out anything inside, while I waited for something— anything to come out of the darkness. I turned to the shelf next to me and grabbed a flashlight. After pointing it toward the black hole in the ceiling, I still couldn’t make out anything, so I contemplated my options. Less thinking, just do, Mel. I knew that if I waited any longer, my thoughts would scare me into complete paralysis, so I began to climb. With each step, the ladder let out a painful creak. This ladder was as old as the house, and I have no idea if it was ever inspected. The way it would bend under my very minimal bodyweight made me realize the very real possibility that it could give out at any time. We really need to have this thing inspected

The black hole grew bigger and bigger with each step. I held my breath the whole time, ready for either the ladder to crumble beneath me or something to emerge from the darkness. Thankfully, neither of those things happened. Once my head breached the attic opening, I remembered to breathe, and drew in a large breath of stale, musty air.
I scanned the attic with my flashlight. It wasn’t really a room— more just a storage space between the ceiling of the garage and the roof of the house. The ceiling formed a triangle with the highest point being only five feet tall. As I slowly panned my flashlight across the space, its beam revealed various objects in storage— an old dollhouse, a large shop vacuum, a full-sized scarecrow, a snow shovel, a vintage suitcase, a pair of kayak paddles, several boxes, and lots of Christmas and Halloween decorations. The holiday decorations appeared pretty unsettling in the beam of the flashlight
probably because a lot of them had faces that were looking back at me. The witch especially gave me the creeps with her pale, green skin, hands covered in warts, and open mouth full of yellow teeth. Oh and don’t forget the random Christmas elf’s detached head just resting on top of a box with its single, beady eye reflecting back at me! Why does it only have one eye?? Why is its head not with its body?? Why do we even have this thing??
After doing a full scan of the space with my flashlight, I reached behind me to turn on the attic light. The second the light turned on, I jumped as I heard the sound of movement coming from the pile of junk in front of me. I held my breath and stared long and hard, while looking for any sign of movement. THAT WITCH BETTER NOT MOVE, I SWEAR. After a long minute of waiting, nothing had moved in the slightest.
Just as I was letting out my long awaited exhale, a loud, “BWAK BWAK BWAK,” erupted from my right side. I whipped my head around to reveal a plush toy of a chicken lying on the floor on its side.
“BWAK BWAK BWAK,” its electronic voice box cried out again. I looked around, wondering what could have caused it to go off. The floorboards beneath me creaked as I crawled my way over to the plush chicken and picked it up. I stared into its black, soulless eyes. There was something about this chicken. It felt too personal for some reason— almost like it was a taunt. Then, I heard the sound of movement coming from the pile of junk again. I looked back and could have sworn one of the objects had moved. Was it the witch? The scarecrow? I couldn’t tell for sure.
I waited several seconds before directing my attention back to the chicken. That’s when I noticed something behind it. About 4 feet up from the floor, there was a very small hole in the wall about the size of a pea. I put my eye up to it, and my stomach lurched. Through the hole, I could see right into my bedroom. I couldn’t see the bed so well, but I could make out pretty much anything at eye level. Whoever or WHATEVER was in the attic could have been watching us this whole time. From inside the bedroom, the hole was positioned just under one of the framed pictures hanging on the wall. The shadow from the frame must have concealed it all this time. I could feel my heart rate begin to drastically accelerate. I turned back to the pile of junk, since whoever or whatever was in the attic with me must be hiding somewhere in that pile.
That’s when I noticed what had changed. Earlier, the scarecrow was sitting upright with its back against a box, but now it was slumped over with one hand extended out toward me. And was it closer?? I stared at its still, faceless head hidden in shadow beneath the brim of a wide, black farmer’s hat. I looked for any sign of life in its body, which wore a red flannel shirt covered in hay and stained khaki pants with patches on the knees. I began to hyperventilate. Come on, Mel! If you have a panic attack now, you are done for!
I slowly backed away from the scarecrow until I heard a loud CRUNCH under my feet. I looked down and saw that I had stepped on an empty plastic water bottle. I gasped in horror as I noticed several other empty water bottles along with empty food cans and a pile of blankets resembling a makeshift bed. SOMEONE WAS LIVING IN OUR ATTIC.
Before I could react, I heard fast stomping coming right toward me. I looked up and saw the scarecrow LUNGING for me. I fell onto my back with my eyes closed, and braced for the inevitable. I heard the sound of movement, the creaking of the ladder, and then all was silent. My eyes slowly opened. The scarecrow had vanished.
I crawled over to the attic entrance in the floor. The garage light below had now been switched off, so the way down was nothing but a black void. I grabbed the flashlight and pointed it down into the garage. I let out a gasp as I saw the scarecrow standing directly at the bottom of the ladder facing up at me. I wanted to scream, but nothing was coming out. It stood there perfectly still
almost too still for a person to be inside of it. Was this a person?? I waited and waited until
it CHARGED at the ladder, making its way toward me.
I frantically dove toward the pile of junk and grabbed a paddle to defend myself. When I turned back to the ladder, the scarecrow was gone. There was only the rickety ladder and the black void below me. I gave myself a few seconds to catch my breath. If I was in fact dealing with what I suspected I was dealing with, I had a right to be scared out of my mind. I also knew that I couldn’t let it get to Jason first. Whatever this thing was, I had to stop it.
After taking a deep breath, I made my way down the ladder. I held my flashlight in one hand and the paddle in the other. I made sure to alternate the flashlight between the steps below me and the rest of the garage. If the scarecrow was able to knock me off the ladder, I would be done for. When my feet finally touched the concrete floor, I wanted to let out a sigh of relief, but I knew the fight was still ahead of me
.or maybe behind me. It was so dark, the scarecrow really could have been anywhere.
If I could just make it to the door to the house, I knew I could flip on the light, spot the scarecrow, and charge it with everything I had. I walked as fast as I could toward the door, whipping my flashlight in all directions. I only got halfway through the garage when I heard a loud squeaking noise to my left. I knew I wasn’t getting the chance to make it to the light switch. I slowly turned my flashlight to reveal the scarecrow slumped over and sitting on an old, red Radio Flyer wagon.
This was it. I knew that the element of surprise was all I had.
I charged at it with everything inside of me. I swung the paddle again and again with all of my strength. I wouldn’t let this thing ruin the life I had worked so hard to obtain. I didn’t stop swinging until the scarecrow was completely facedown on the ground. My rage turned to fear as I slowly sensed something was off. I realized the scarecrow’s torso had become completely separated from its legs during the beating. My heart nearly stopped when I finally realized that there was nothing inside of the scarecrow but hay.
I poked its body a few times before I noticed a trail of straw leading away from it. Wherever this trail led to, I knew it wasn’t going to be good. As I followed the trail of hay with my flashlight in one hand, I shakily held my paddle in the other, ready to strike again. The trail curled away from me until it ended at A PAIR OF BARE HUMAN FEET. I let out a quiet scream as I tilted my flashlight up as fast as I could and—WHAM! I could barely make out the image of a metal baseball bat whirling toward my head before everything went black.
I woke up only a few seconds later on the garage floor with my head throbbing in pain. My vision was fuzzy, but I could see there was a shape standing in front of me. It was backlit by the light of my flashlight, which had rolled away from me. It took a few seconds for my eyes to focus on the pair of bare, dirty feet in front of me, covered in hay. As I slowly tilted my head up, I could see those feet were attached to a pair of legs wearing tattered pants. Those legs were attached to a body with two arms— one holding a metal baseball bat. The body was attached to a head, and on that head, was a face. It was exactly the face I feared I would see. It was the face of a woman with the exact same face as me— the face of Melody Bennett.
“No,” I gasped. “How did—“
Melody stared at me with rage in her eyes. Pieces of hay covered her hair.
I turned my head to the side and looked at the scarecrow’s lifeless, empty body next to me. Then, I turned and looked at Melody’s hay-covered feet.
I have to admit it now. Wearing the scarecrow as a disguise was a brilliant strategy. She really took a page from my book of deception and used it against me.
“Your life was mine,” I began to cry with eyes full of fear. “I took it from you.”
“I’m taking it back,” she declared and raised her bat high.
I tried to let out a scream, but it was too late. She was already on top of me. Whaling on me with the speed and aggression of a wild animal. She struck my head with the baseball bat again and again. With each blow, I could feel my face start to change out of the face of Melody and back into its natural form. First, my mouth morphed away, followed by my nose, and then my ears. Just as she was about to swing what would have been the killing blow, I threw my hand up and grabbed the bat. Both of us were now struggling for control of the bat. That’s when I could see my true face reflected in Melody’s eyes. My two eyes were wide and bulging, completely filled with terror. My other features were completely gone. Smooth skin was now in their place. I looked into Melody’s eyes as we struggled with the bat. This was a woman that would stop at nothing to take back her life and be rid of me. I wasn’t going to win this fight. I had to escape.
My fear somehow gave me enough adrenaline to throw her off of me. I knew I only had a second before she would be on top of me again, so I booked it out of the house as fast as I could.
I didn’t stop running until I was across the street hidden in the shadows of a neighbor’s tree. I turned back to see Melody standing in front of her house blocking any hope I had of going back there to her beautiful, lovely life— a life, which she had taken for granted until now. She had the last five weeks to think about it as she was living in the attic. All that time, she watched helplessly behind the wall of her own bedroom as I, an imposter wearing her face, tried my best to pass as her. She had all that time to watch me, study my weaknesses, and devise a plan to take her life back.
From across the street, I watched as she took in one last big breath, smelling the fresh air and appreciating the world she had once taken for granted. She slowly exhaled before walking confidently back into her house and locking me out for good.
I can’t tell you how frustrated I am that this one didn’t work out for me. I thought for sure that I had killed Melody before I had replaced her. I thought for sure that I was going to get to live in her place forever. I won’t make the same mistake again. Next time, I will make sure the person I am replacing is actually dead.
I know most of you reading this will probably think I’m just a normal person making this story up to scare you. I was counting on that. You probably wouldn’t believe me if I told you that there are many like me living among you.
To those of you that are like me, please let me know if you have had a similarly frustrating experience. Besides the very obvious mistake I already mentioned, what can I do differently next time? If you have any advice or know anything else I did wrong, please tell me.
I just want to find a nice life and be happy like everyone else. Why does it have to be this difficult?
submitted by ProvenStrange to nosleep [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 13:02 sann540 (1/2) May 2023

2-May-2023

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15-May-2023
submitted by sann540 to dailyainews [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 05:04 m_halo Finely single and dog free

This could have easily been a book but I’ll try to be vague.
It’s long overdue but I finely ended things with my gf. It’s been a two year long rollercoaster of misery, misplaced anger, humiliation and 
dog semen.
I won’t elaborate too much on ups and downs of our relationship (that’s whole another story) but the final straw was her saying that if she had to choose saving human life or a dog she would have chosen a dog, thousand times over, even if it were my son’s.
Dog runs this house.
I should have known this the very minute I stepped inside my gf’s tiny two bed apartment. Filthy couch with throw covering up dog filth from when poor little pooper had “an accident”. Dog necessities everywhere, not one, not two but 5 dog beds including a crusty old pillow on which the shit beast relieves itself đŸ€ą
This miserable creature was literally allowed to do whatever it please. Jump on furniture, on her bed, scratching itself on a wall leading to her apartment, leaving brown trail of dog filth. It would follow her around the apartment, always begging for treats. Whenever someone was in the kitchen, it would climb up on a couch backrest, nearly falling off of it and literally with its face in the cooking pots. Hair and dander everywhere and shitty asshole on where humans would later sit down. It’s a smartest and most intelligent dog on Earth (and handsomest one of course) that she only whenever it’s cleaning time and she starts vacuuming, it would flip a switch in his pigeon brain and it would start humping the Dyson. (It’s no surprise dog is not neutered)
My gf allowed this behaviour and let it finish itself off on a aforementioned crusty old pillow. That obnoxious creature would after walk around the apartment with his thing still dripping cum.
Going walkies was always stressful for me as she kept refusing to leash her dog. She would ger told off by passers by almost daily as her dog would always get in someone’s way on walk or bicycle paths or it would run up to other dogs even without the other owner’s consent. She would blatantly allow her dog to invade people’s personal space, piss and shit where “no dog toilet” signs were up, on communal lawns or next to children’s playground and would argue with anyone who would reprimand her. How dare you!
Going somewhere with a car wasn’t any different. This neurotic dog was allowed to roam freely around the car without harness. It would maybe sit on the back seat for 1.5 minutes before deciding it likes it more in the front, on a drivers knees. It’s illegal here to be holding a dog on drivers knees while driving l, at highway speeds especially, but law doesn’t apply to my dog, right? We’re special. Gangway! Fido behind the wheel.
Same goes to leash laws in and around forests, my doggo loves animals and wouldn’t hurt a fly. Why wouldn’t it be allowed to play with them? It’s favourite thing is digging up rodents holes. Bonus points for finding a nest and manage to kill few. Those damn instincts.
You can’t own a dog if you’re not an animal lover and an activist yourself. And by animals you mean your dog, of course. After all you single handily saved this gods creature from an evil puppy mill. You’ve taken it from its birth mom to your tiny apartment to keep it for your amusement, ehm friendship. You’ve given it shelter, fed it human food (because of its special dietary needs and multiple food allergies). You’ve pumped it with meds because of its genetic disorders from birth. You’ve called it family member and everyone who says or thinks differently is a dog hater and you showed him the doors. You’ve kept pushing people visiting your house to worship it by petting and letting it lick them, it loves you and is happy to see you, see. You’ve corrected everyone who dared calling it a DOG.
Yeah nah, I’m good
submitted by m_halo to Dogfree [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 01:05 we-are-humanity Imaginaire partie 2

La discrimination est un autre exemple de nos actions. Elle est basĂ©e sur une diffĂ©rence insignifiante de l’individu. La peur de l’étranger qui prend racine dans la nature de l’Homme durant ces premiĂšres gĂ©nĂ©rations. Et cette mĂ©fiance est si futile et irrationnelle qu’elle est capable d’infliger de lourd dĂ©gĂąt lorsqu’on l’a mise dans la tĂȘte de tous. Et malgrĂ© la religion et la science qui ont pour vocation d’unir l’humanitĂ© vers la lumiĂšre. La peur, l’obscurantisme et beaucoup d’influence prennent parfois le dessus. Et les rĂ©sultats obtenus sont trĂšs Ă©loquents. Nous avons implantĂ© les discriminations dans toutes les cultures, elles prennent des formes et des degrĂ©s diffĂ©rents, mais sont prĂ©sentes Ă  toutes les Ă©chelles, discriminations sur les religions, sur la couleur de peau, sur les origines, opinions. Toutes les diffĂ©rences entre individus sont des prĂ©textes supplĂ©mentaires pour ajouter de l’animositĂ© dans homo sapiens. Fort Ă  l’extĂ©rieur faible Ă  l’intĂ©rieur. Le XXĂšme siĂšcle sera pour tous un siĂšcle trĂšs mouvementĂ©. Il voit le jour avec l’apothĂ©ose des grands empires qui traduit la soif d’exploration de nouvelles contrĂ©es et de domination face Ă  lui-mĂȘme. Sa propre colonisation fera des ravages. Au dĂ©but du siĂšcle se produit un Ă©vĂ©nements que nous n’avons pas du tout imaginĂ©. La dĂ©couverte par des scientifiques de la relativitĂ© restreinte. Cette thĂ©orie scientifique est le premier pas vers la dĂ©couverte notre espĂšce mais Ă©galement de notre univers. Elle est la raison de ma mission sur Terre, car l’humain Ă©volue de plus en plus vite avec ce surplus d’énergie. Il lui reste beaucoup Ă  faire avant de le voir nous envahir. Mais si rien n’est fait il le fera pour sĂ»r avec au moins autant de cruautĂ© qu’il s’est infligĂ© Ă  lui-mĂȘme. DissipĂ© l’énergie apportĂ© par les Ă©nergies fossiles, telle est notre mission. Pour l’accomplir nous avons Ă©tudiĂ© la situation d’homo sapiens. Il s’est appropriĂ© toute sa planĂšte. Et dans le monde colonial qu’il s’est infligĂ©, plus aucun individu n’est indĂ©pendant vis Ă  vis de son semblable. GrĂące aux progrĂšs techniques notamment mais surtout Ă  l’idĂ©e grandissante de nation qui s’est diffusĂ©e avec la pĂ©riode des empires. Par un jeu d’alliance bien aiguiller de notre part, un conflit entre deux nations peut entraĂźner par effet domino des milliers voire des millions d’hommes vers un combat meurtrier. Une guerre mondiale, planĂ©taire. Nous avons dĂ©montrĂ© qu’il Ă©tait possible d’entraĂźner l’humanitĂ© toute entiĂšre dans un conflit sanglant et d’évaporĂ© toute l’énergie de notre victime dans sa propre perte. Cette guerre nous a fait beaucoup progresser, elle a ouvert une boĂźte de Pandore. Une course Ă  l’armement, un dĂ©veloppement de technologie jamais vu dans notre but de tuĂ© homo sapiens. Nous avons naturellement dĂ©cidĂ© de tout mettre en Ɠuvre pour laisser cette boĂźte ouverte. Nous nous sommes assurĂ©s de voir signer les traitĂ©s de paix les moins pacifistes qu’ils soient. Qui invitent Ă  la vengeance. Pour voir naitre nouvelle guerre mondiale. Nous avons imaginĂ© un nouveau schĂ©ma pour contrĂŽler les États. Au lieu d’une famille royale ou d’un systĂšme dĂ©mocratique, qui laisse peu de marge de manƓuvre pour nos conseillers. Nous avons imaginĂ© un systĂšme oĂč tous les pouvoirs reposeraient dans les mains d’un seul homme. Centraliser le pouvoir nous facilite la tĂąche. Dans les dĂ©mocraties ou la diversitĂ© d’opinion est importante, il nous faut convaincre beaucoup plus de monde pour arriver Ă  nos fins. Plus il y a de diversitĂ© moins la population du pays est mallĂ©able pour nous. A l’inverse plus le dictateur a une emprise sur sa population plus nous pouvons faire de grandes choses. Nous rĂ©duisons au maximum la diversitĂ© intellectuelle du pays en dupliquant l’idĂ©ologie du grand chef dans la tĂȘte de tous ses citoyens. Ainsi s’il saute d’une falaise c’est toute sa nation qui sautera avec lui, dans l’hypothĂšse oĂč la diversitĂ© cognitive ait Ă©tĂ© rĂ©duite Ă  zĂ©ro. Et au milieu du XXĂšme siĂšcle nous avons failli atteindre ce zĂ©ro. On a mĂȘme cru voir la fin d’homo sapiens. Nous avions acquis tellement de pouvoir avec nos dictateurs que nous n’avons mĂȘme pas eu de contestation Ă  la mise Ă  mort de dizaines de millions d’humains. Nous avons mis en place une organisation mĂ©thodique, une industrialisation de la mort, cela nous a Ă©tĂ© trĂšs compliquĂ©. Il a fallu diviser la tĂąche pour que chacun apporte une petite pierre au tombeau de l’humanitĂ©, tout en dissimulant le plus possible le rĂ©sultat final. Aussi il a fallu mettre en place un planning de la mort. En effet s’il ne se soucie pas de ce qu’il ne voit pas, l’humain ne peut pas vivre sans voir. Malheureusement l’humain reste un animal imprĂ©visible et nos dictateurs se sont laissĂ© avoir par leur soif primitive de domination. Et ont provoquĂ© leurs chutes en provoquant plus fort qu’eux. Certes elle a entraĂźnĂ© la mort de millions d’humains mais a fait faillir notre tentative de mise Ă  mort totale. Toutefois cette guerre mondiale nous a apportĂ© la clĂ© de notre mission. La bombe atomique. L’homme a dĂ©couvert la rĂ©action nuclĂ©aire en chaine, mais toute dĂ©couverte n’est pas bonne Ă  prendre surtout en temps de guerre ou le seul but est de tuĂ©. Ainsi cette dĂ©couverte sera immĂ©diatement mise Ă  disposition comme une nouvelle arme de destruction de masse. Une arme monstrueuse capable de rĂ©duire Ă  nĂ©ant des milliers de vie humaine en une fraction de seconde. Quel que soit le futur, cette arme est un pas en avant vers l’extinction d’homo sapiens. Cette arme est irrationnelle, Ă  l’image de la pĂ©riode Ă  laquelle elle a Ă©tĂ© crĂ©Ă©. Mais c’est une nouvelle boĂźte de Pandore qui s’est ouverte et cette boĂźte a changĂ© Ă  tout jamais notre approche de la mission. La prioritĂ© Ă©tant maintenant d’arrĂȘtĂ© Ă  tout prix homo sapiens quitte Ă  faire une impasse sur la vie sur Terre. AprĂšs cette guerre les humains ont mis en place une organisation mondiale censĂ©e ramener la paix et ne plus jamais se voir reproduire les horreurs passĂ©es. Et pourtant Ă  peine le conflit terminĂ© que des tensions internationales sont rĂ©apparues. Les traitĂ©s de paix ne viennent pas apporter la paix, mais encore une fois rĂ©compenser les vainqueurs, en leur donnant une position Ă  part dans l’organisation. Ils sont ancrĂ©s dans l’outil de paix et personne ne peut les arrĂȘter. Pour recrĂ©er un climat de tension et de mise en danger d’homo sapiens, nous avons distribuĂ© l’arme atomique Ă  de nombreuses nations pour que la prochaine guerre mondiale devienne nuclĂ©aire et rĂ©duise en poussiĂšre notre espĂšce ciblĂ©e. De plus nous travaillons depuis lors Ă  la mise en place de dictateurs aussi puissant que ceux d’antan mais avec le feu atomique toujours dans les mĂȘmes ambitions. Nous avons Ă  nouveau dirigĂ© les jeux d’alliance pour crĂ©e au rang mondial une bipolarisation du monde. PĂ©riode comparable au moyen Ăąge oĂč les religions se battaient pour imposer sa vĂ©ritĂ© aux autres. Il y eu beaucoup de conflits indirects entre les deux blocs, Ă  chaque fois nous pensons avoir accompli notre travail. Mais l’humain est si illisible que notre succĂšs est encore Ă  faire et la bombe atomique n’a pas encore Ă©tĂ© employĂ© Ă  grande Ă©chelle. Ces guerres nous ont quand mĂȘme donnĂ© une nouvelle carte en main en distribuant des millions d’armes de guerre Ă  un trĂšs grand nombre d’humains. Ce qui constitue un excellent terreau pour convertir Ă  l’échelle individuelle les conflits entre États, et utiliser toutes formes de discriminations pour faire pression sur la dĂ©tente. C’est dans ce contexte de chaos que j’ai Ă©tĂ© envoyĂ© en mission. Peu avant mon arrivĂ©e deux choses crĂ©e par l’homme, allaient bouleverser mon planning, internet et les smartphones. Ces deux inventions combinĂ©es ont permis Ă  l’homme moderne de faire une petite rĂ©volution qui est de connectĂ© en temps rĂ©el des centaines de millions d’individus. Et dans notre optique de casser les liens entre les individus cela nous a inquiĂ©tĂ©. En plus cette technologie s’est appliquĂ©e simultanĂ©ment dans tous les pays, pour tout le monde. Elle a mis en lumiĂšre des absurditĂ©s, fait trembler des dictatures, car n’importe qui peut partager au monde entier ce qu’il voit sans aucun filtre ni aucun dĂ©lai. Mais ce nouvel univers digital, nous l’avons su nous l’approprier. En effet l’internet rĂ©uni tous les humains, toutes les cultures car il ne possĂšde aucune restriction. Il rĂ©unit l’homme dans un univers fictif. C’est grĂące Ă  cette particularitĂ© qu’il peut ĂȘtre un outil trĂšs puissant. Étant donnĂ© qu’il n’est pas contrĂŽlĂ© notre anonymat en est garantie, de plus la maniĂšre de fonctionnement d’internet implique de stocker toutes sortes d’informations trĂšs prĂ©cises sur chacun des utilisateurs. Ces informations nous y avons accĂšs, et plus il y a d’humains sur internet plus notre connaissance dans homo sapiens s’affine. Ces informations nous montrent instantanĂ©ment les effets de nos influences sur la cible. Avec internet, les rĂ©seaux sociaux se sont progressivement dĂ©matĂ©rialisĂ©s. Nous les avons d’abord soumis aux jeunes humains qui sont nos cibles les plus influençables et le futur de l’humanitĂ©. Cette nouvelle arme que sont les rĂ©seaux sociaux nous a permis d’éloigner encore plus l’humain Ă  lui-mĂȘme, d’alimenter les tensions en son sein en dupliquant toutes les formes de discriminations dĂ©jĂ  prĂ©sentes dans le monde rĂ©el et en y ajoutant un nombre illimitĂ© de fausses informations. L’humain a rĂ©cemment fait Ă©voluer son monde d’interaction digitale avec des rĂ©seaux sociaux qui utilisent la mĂ©moire de court terme. Cette Ă©volution amplifie le phĂ©nomĂšne de bulle cognitive avec une rĂ©pĂ©tition intensive d’informations similaires et une augmentation du temps d’exposition Ă  ces rĂ©seaux de nouvelle gĂ©nĂ©ration. La mĂ©moire Ă  court terme ne laisse pas la place aux rĂ©flexions posĂ©es mais Ă  l’irrationalitĂ© et aux Ă©motions ce qui a tendance Ă  accentuer encore d’avantage l’addiction de l’individu. Nous sommes maintenant capables de mettre chaque individu dans sa bulle face Ă  son Ă©cran, de telle sorte qu’il n’y ait pas deux bulles similaires, qu’il n’y ait pas deux humains semblables. Qu’ils ne se reconnaissent plus pour qu’ils s’affrontent tous. En plus ces rĂ©seaux sociaux font apparaĂźtre leurs contenu grĂące Ă  un algorithme, ce qui permet de choisir ce qui sera vu par qui, quand et oĂč. Nous pouvons choisir qui ira dans quelle bulle. Ainsi pour notre plus grand bonheur l’humain nous a fait cadeau de l’outil de propagande le plus puissant jamais vu dans son existence. On a obtenu en quelque sorte une dĂ©matĂ©rialisation de la vie sociale d’homo sapiens, et une simplification de notre mission par la mĂȘme occasion. C’est notre nouveau moyen de pouvoir sur homo sapiens, et dans le futur nous allons le synchroniser avec les dictatures dĂ©jĂ  existantes. Ce cocktail explosif n’a que peu de chance d’aboutir Ă  une vraie fin pure et simple de l’espĂšce entiĂšre. Cela peut au plus lui apporter quelques Ă©gratignures. Tous ces artifices n’ont que vocation Ă  dĂ©tourner l’attention et Ă  dissiper au maximum l’énergie acquise grĂące aux Ă©nergie fossiles. Car durant tout ce temps Ă©coulĂ© l’humain a dĂ©ployĂ© une Ă©nergie folle pour se battre contre lui-mĂȘme et tous ces conflits lui ont apportĂ© des blessures qui finissent naturellement par cicatrisĂ©es et n’auront laissĂ© derriĂšre elles que quelques marques inutiles Ă  son existence. Alors que pour nous ces conflits sont un gaspillage d’énergie trĂšs intĂ©ressant car elle n’est pas utilisĂ©e pour son savoir et elle propage notre poison en quantitĂ© abondante. Notre poison est le rĂ©sultat de la combustion d’énergie fossile. Un gaz Ă  effet de serre trĂšs puissant. Il a Ă©tĂ© emprisonnĂ© par un long processus naturel long de plusieurs dizaines de millions d’annĂ©es. Et tous ce gaz Ă  effet de serre capturĂ© Ă  lentement changĂ© le climat sur Terre et a ainsi Ă  l’aide de la sĂ©lection naturelle fait Ă©voluer les diffĂ©rentes espĂšces dĂ©jĂ  prĂ©sentes. Les grands singes ont Ă©voluĂ© en homo sapiens indirectement grĂące au changement climatique trĂšs progressif apportĂ© avec la captation de carbone au fil du temps. Notre idĂ©e est essentiellement basĂ©e sur la destruction du travail de la nature. Et de maniĂšre trĂšs brutale de tel sorte qu’aucune espĂšce n’ait le temps d’évoluer. Comme pour la fin des dinosaures ou un changement climatique brusque, entraĂźner par un astĂ©roĂŻde, a provoquĂ© l’extinction d’une majeure partie de la biodiversitĂ© prĂ©sente et a Ă©liminĂ© dĂ©finitivement la majoritĂ© des espĂšces prĂ©sentes. En fait le dĂ©rĂšglement climatique ne tue pas directement homo sapiens, mais disparition des conditions de son apparition va provoquer sa propre perte. Nos calculs ont dĂ©montrĂ© qu’une espĂšce n’aura jamais la mĂȘme Ă©nergie que l’ensemble des espĂšces vivantes additionnĂ©s. Cela pour la simple et bonne raison qu’aucune espĂšce du monde vivant capte l’énergie de la mĂȘme maniĂšre et qu’aucune espĂšce n’est capable de capter l’énergie reçu par sa planĂšte de toutes les maniĂšres diffĂ©rentes. Certes le savoir d’homo sapiens lui a permis d’acquĂ©rir des technologies capables de capter de diffĂ©rentes maniĂšres de l’énergie, mais trĂšs rares sont les techniques qui sont aussi optimisĂ©es que des centaines de millions d’annĂ©es de sĂ©lection naturel. Ainsi chaque extinction d’espĂšces est autant d’énergie nĂ©cessaire pour remplacer sa fonction dans la biodiversitĂ© et prĂ©server un environnement hospitalier. Et ainsi plus le nombre d’espĂšces disparus est important plus il faut de l’énergie pour compenser leurs fonctions. C’est un cercle vicieux, si trop d’espĂšces disparaissent, homo sapiens perd toute l’énergie captĂ© par ces espĂšces, et en dĂ©pense infiniment plus pour remplacer leurs rĂŽles sur Terre. Et comme nous l’avons rendu dĂ©pend aux Ă©nergie fossiles la boucle est bouclĂ©e. L’extinction d’une espĂšce est une petite victoire pour nous car cela signifie que la Terre perd les conditions Ă  la survie de la biodiversitĂ© d’homo sapiens. Et donc le rapproche de sa disparition et la rĂ©ussite de notre deuxiĂšme piste, provoquer le changement brusque des conditions climatiques sur la planĂšte Terre et entraĂźner avec elle la disparition d’homo sapiens. J’ai compris mon travail, je vais influencer l’homme sur les rĂ©seaux sociaux. Mais pour moi avant de se lancer sur les rĂ©seaux sociaux, il faut se faire un rĂ©seau dans le monde rĂ©el pour comprendre un peu plus comment les humains en gĂ©nĂ©ral interagissent entre eux. Depuis ma prĂ©sence sur Terre mes Ă©changes sociaux ont Ă©tĂ© trĂšs restreins comme on me l’avait conseillĂ©. J’ai le sentiment que je suis assez grand que j’ai suffisamment d’expĂ©rience de la vie pour pouvoir contrĂŽler mes Ă©motions. Je pense que je peux me lancer Ă  discuter avec de nouvelles personnes. Je ne sais pas comment m’y prendre mais par mimĂ©tisme je progresse, et puis je suis encore entourĂ© d’amis. Donc j’échange avec de nouveaux humains mais je ne me suis pas vraiment mis au premier plan, je prĂ©fĂšre encore rester avec mes anciens copains. La peur de l’inconnu prime. Mais un monde inconnu m’intrigue plus que tout depuis un certain temps il n’est pas chez l’homme il est chez la femme. Je ne connais rien de ces personnes. Pourtant au plus profond de moi je ressens quelque chose d’indescriptible qui attire perpĂ©tuellement mon regard vers ces cheveux longs, vers ces silhouettes sublimes. Dans mon esprit ces trĂ©sors sont hors de portĂ©e d’un homme comme moi enfermĂ© sur lui-mĂȘme. Qui ne se reconnaĂźt mĂȘme pas dans un miroir. De plus la femme est l’ĂȘtre vivant interdit lors de nos missions, il a Ă©tĂ© rĂ©pertoriĂ© comme Ă©tant crĂ©ateur d’émotions incontrĂŽlables et donc extrĂȘmement dangereuses pour notre mission. Par nature l’homme est plus fort physiquement que la femme c’est lui qui dĂ©cide dans le monde d’homo sapiens. Nous avons donc aucun intĂ©rĂȘt a liĂ© des rĂ©seaux avec la femme vu qu’elle n’a aucun pouvoir sur la population, mieux vaut concentrer nos efforts sur l’homme. Et pourtant ce quelque chose au fond du moi humain m’as fait vouloir parler Ă  cet ĂȘtre inconnu. J’ai essayĂ© par le passĂ© Ă  m’adresser au visage, mais inexpĂ©rimentĂ© je n’ai jamais eu aucun retour. J’avais laissĂ© tomber cette idĂ©e et m’étais concentrĂ© sur ma quĂȘte. Et lĂ  sans prĂ©venir, soudainement tu es venue, je ne sais pas pourquoi mais tout de suite j’ai compris, que tu n’étais pas comme les autres. Pourtant je ne te connaissais pas je ne te scrutais pas comme les autres. Je n’ai jamais posĂ© mon regard sur toi, et ne t’ai jamais projetĂ© dans mon esprit comme je l’ai fait avec tant d’autres. Je ne connais mĂȘme pas ton prĂ©nom. Et pourtant toi, tu veux Ă  tout prix connaĂźtre le miens. Ma plus grande peur. J’ai Ă©tĂ© pris de cours surpris par les Ă©vĂ©nements. Et quand tu m’as montrĂ© ton intĂ©rĂȘt pour moi, je n’ai pas su rĂ©pondre. D’un cĂŽtĂ© si je refusais je provoquerais chez toi une forme de haine que j’ai dĂ©jĂ  pu observer par le passĂ© et qui peut nuire. De l’autre si j’accepte je dĂ©calerai cette fatalitĂ© Ă  plus tard, et subviendrai Ă  ce je ne sais quoi qui bouillonnait en moi. J’ai pris la deuxiĂšme option et Ă©tais assez confiant pour que cette mĂ©saventure se termine vite. J’ai pris tout de suite le plus de distance possible et j’étais Ă  peu prĂšs sĂ»r que ma personne te rĂ©pugnerait. J’ai commis de nombreuses erreurs qui t’ont blessĂ©es. C’est la premiĂšre fois de ma vie que je voyais directement les consĂ©quences de mes actes. Que je voyais que si je disais cela tu rĂ©agirais comme ceci. Au dĂ©but je tĂątonnais, il y a eu beaucoup de ratĂ©. Je n’étais pas sensible aux ratĂ©s je m’en rĂ©jouissais mĂȘme et espĂ©rai que tu te sĂ©parerais pour mettre fin Ă  mon erreur, et pour reprendre ma mission. Mais contre toute attente tu restais, sans savoir pourquoi tu restais mais tu Ă©tais lĂ  tout prĂšs de moi. J’avais l’impression que ma seule prĂ©sence t’apportait quelque chose d’incroyable. Elle dessinait sur ton visage un sourire que je n’avais encore jamais vu. Pour ma part ta prĂ©sence m’étonnait encore mais avec le temps j’ai fini par t’accepter. Chaque jour de plus avec toi Ă©tais une surprise pour moi, ma peur de faillir ma mission s’érodait peu Ă  peu, avec elle mon but de montĂ© un nouveau rĂ©seau s’arrĂȘtait. Et ce temps passĂ© auprĂšs de toi m’as permis de dĂ©couvrir l’autre sexe d’homo sapiens. La vie sur Terre pour toi est bien plus difficile que pour moi. L’homme Ă©tant plus fort physiquement, il a naturellement dominĂ© les premiers instants d’homo sapiens. Et depuis il n’a jamais lĂąchĂ© sa domination. Il a tout construit Ă  son modĂšle. Toutes les sociĂ©tĂ©s toutes les religions, tout a Ă©tĂ© construit par l’homme pour l’homme. Ainsi la vie sur Terre pour les femmes et bien plus compliquĂ© que pour nous. Et cette vĂ©ritĂ© m’a plutĂŽt choquĂ©. Pendant toutes ces annĂ©es les femmes ont Ă©tĂ© sur la touche du monde uniquement Ă  cause de leurs faiblesses physiques et elles le sont encore aujourd’hui. Mais ce que j’ai vu en toi c’est que cette faiblesse physique t’as formĂ© une force mentale que je n’ai vu nulle part ailleurs. Un esprit infiniment plus fort que le mien. En fait Ă  l’opposer de l’homme, la femme est faible Ă  l’extĂ©rieur mais forte Ă  l’intĂ©rieur. Cela doit ĂȘtre pour cette raison aussi que nous ne ciblons pas Ă  la femme dans nos missions. Quand je suis avec toi je ressens ton attention, je n’en avais jamais connu une pareil. Toute ma vie je suis restĂ© dans mon coin fermĂ©, je me plais bien avec moi-mĂȘme. Mais toi tu en as dĂ©cidĂ© autrement et Ă  chaque fois que tu en avais l’occasion tu venais te blottir contre moi. Et Ă  force de te voir, d’échanger avec toi, de partager des Ă©motions, non seulement je t’ai dĂ©couvert, mais en plus je me suis dĂ©couvert moi-mĂȘme tu as Ă©tĂ© mon miroir. Pour la premiĂšre fois dans ma vie j’ai pris conscience de qui j’étais et tu m’as donnĂ© confiance en qui j’étais. Et un jour la surprise aprĂšs tout ce que tu m’as montrĂ© de toi. Tu m’as montrĂ© ta dĂ©tresse intĂ©rieure que tu m’avais cachĂ©, que tu avais accumulĂ© avec toutes mes erreurs passĂ©es. Et pour la premiĂšre fois j’ai Ă©tĂ© Ă©mu, j’ai ressenti ce qui sommeillait au fond de moi, je tenais Ă  toi. Je tenais Ă  voir ton sourire sur ton visage, je tenais au regard bienveillant que tu me portais, je tenais Ă  te voir heureuse c’est ce que j’espĂ©rais profondĂ©ment chaque jour pour toi. Mais lĂ  tu m’as cachĂ© ton sourire. Alors j’ai dĂ©cidĂ© de changer et de m’ouvrir Ă  toi. Car mon dĂ©sir le plus profond c’était de revoir ce sourire encore et encore. C’est l’élixir de mon bonheur, ma raison de vivre. J’ai fait comme tu m’as appris, je me suis collĂ© Ă  toi je ne te regardais plus que toi. Tu Ă©tais mon tout Ă  mes yeux. Et nous Ă©tions heureux, j’ai mĂȘme appris Ă  sourire comme tu me l’as montrĂ©. Ma vie Ă©tait belle j’étais heureux comme je ne l’ai jamais Ă©tĂ© auparavant, heureux d’ĂȘtre un humain, tout allait bien. Je n’étais mĂȘme plus soucieux de ma mission. Mais comme pour toutes choses rien n’est infini et le temps nous a sĂ©parĂ©. Nos environnements nous ont façonnĂ©s diffĂ©remment si bien que les rares fois oĂč nous nous retrouvions, nous ne retrouvions plus cette magie passĂ©e. Ça m’a beaucoup affectĂ©, ce fut dur d’accepter que les bons moments passĂ©s ensemble Ă©taient derriĂšre nous. Ça m’a fait beaucoup souffrir, et longtemps j’ai refusĂ© de l’admettre. Je m’efforçais de croire que ce n’était qu’un passage, de continuĂ© comme si de rien n’était. Mais la vĂ©ritĂ© ma rattrapĂ© et j’ai vu que de dissimuler la vĂ©ritĂ© ne faisait que te blesser un peu plus fort chaque jour. Depuis longtemps je n’avais plus vu ton sourire. La fin de notre histoire, je n’en doutais pas une seconde. J’avais fini par m’y faire l’idĂ©e Ă  m’y prĂ©parer, mais quand allait elle arriver je n’en savais rien, le plus loin possible. Et puis le moment est arrivĂ©, aussi prĂ©visible soit-il. Aux premiers instants j’étais content pour toi, tu avais rĂ©ussi Ă  prendre une grande dĂ©cision, une dĂ©cision que je n’aurais jamais Ă©tĂ© capable de prendre moi-mĂȘme. Et puis nos chemins s’était sĂ©parĂ©, il Ă©tait prĂ©fĂ©rable de se sĂ©parer Ă  notre tour en se souhaitant le meilleur que de forcer le destin et se sĂ©parer en se souhaitant le pire. Mais de mon cĂŽtĂ© je n’avais jamais connu cette situation, j’étais habituĂ© Ă  recevoir une forme d’attention positive de ta part. Ma plus grande peur c’était de la voir disparaĂźtre, elle m’a permis d’avancer, d’avoir un repĂšre sur lequel poser mon regard pendant les tempĂȘtes. Alors j’ai continuĂ© de me comporter comme si de rien n’était, enfin presque je me forçais Ă  montrer un peu plus de distance dans nos Ă©changes mais je n’en pensais pas moins. Et puis la rĂ©alitĂ© m’a Ă©clatĂ© au visage aussi brute et violente. J’ai dĂ©couvert que tu m’avais remplacĂ©. Le choc fĂ»t violent, et j’ai senti une douleur que je n’avais jamais ressenti en plein cƓur, je venais pour la premiĂšre fois de ma vie sentir mon cƓur et cette douleur s’est rĂ©pandu dans tout mon corps. Elle m’a empĂȘchĂ© de dormir, retenue de manger mais surtout elle m’a repris ce que tu m’avais donnĂ©, elle m’a repris mon sourire. Et pour la premiĂšre fois je comprends comment l’humain est capable d’en arriver Ă  faire des folies envers lui-mĂȘme. Les Ă©motions qui le traversent sont trĂšs puissantes. Mais de toutes les Ă©motions connues, celle-ci est sans doute la plus forte. Je t’en voulais et cela me paraissait complĂštement lĂ©gitime. Dans ma tempĂȘte d’émotions je voulais faire resurgir ma violence intĂ©rieure. Je me sentais vide, sans savoir ni quoi faire ni Ă  qui parler, j’étais perdu. Et dans ma tristesse, j’ai prĂ©fĂ©rĂ© me refermer encore une fois sur moi-mĂȘme. Le monde qui m’entoure m’a paru triste. À mes yeux tout ce malheur n’était que de ta faute. Puis un jour, j’ai vu par hasard une photo de vous deux. Et lĂ  sur ton visage j’ai vu ce sourire, ton sourire. Ça a Ă©tĂ© pour moi le signe que tu Ă©tais heureuse comme tu as Ă©tĂ© heureuse avec moi. Et ce sourire m’a rappelĂ© Ă  quel point tu m’as rendu heureux Ă  quel point tu m’as apportĂ© beaucoup de choses, et je m’en suis voulu. J’ai voulu blesser la personne qui m’a donnĂ© tant. Qui m’as appris pourquoi je suis lĂ , pourquoi nous sommes lĂ . Qui m’as appris ce que le mot amour signifiait. Qui m’a donnĂ© conscience qu’avant d’ĂȘtre un espion, je suis un humain. Tu m’as donnĂ© ton amour, tu m’as appris Ă  aimer avec le cƓur et c’est la plus belle chose que j’ai connu. Et cette chose aussi belle que l’amour entre les humains est la raison de notre Ă©chec face Ă  homo sapiens. Car l’amour, aussi longtemps qu’existera la vie, soignera toutes les plais et l’humanitĂ© en ressortira toujours plus belle. Alors si j’écris ce livre, c’est pour te rendre hommage, pour rendre Ă  l’humanitĂ© toute entiĂšre l’amour que tu as su me donner. Tu m’as montrĂ© ce qui reposait au fond de moi, au fond de tous les humains, l’amour. Et c’est cet amour-lĂ  qui m’a changĂ©, qui m’a fait croire en l’humanitĂ©, qui m’a montrĂ© quel est son but dans sa courte vie. Nous ne sommes lĂ  que pour s’aimer, aimer l’humanitĂ©. Pour ton anniversaire, et jusqu’au restant de mon existence je montrerai au monde entier l’amour que tu as su me donner pour moi, pour l’humanitĂ©. Et Pour toute cette histoire et bien plus encore, merci Julie.
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2023.06.02 00:52 we-are-humanity Imaginaire partie 2

La discrimination est un autre exemple de nos actions. Elle est basĂ©e sur une diffĂ©rence insignifiante de l’individu. La peur de l’étranger qui prend racine dans la nature de l’Homme durant ces premiĂšres gĂ©nĂ©rations. Et cette mĂ©fiance est si futile et irrationnelle qu’elle est capable d’infliger de lourd dĂ©gĂąt lorsqu’on l’a mise dans la tĂȘte de tous. Et malgrĂ© la religion et la science qui ont pour vocation d’unir l’humanitĂ© vers la lumiĂšre. La peur, l’obscurantisme et beaucoup d’influence prennent parfois le dessus. Et les rĂ©sultats obtenus sont trĂšs Ă©loquents. Nous avons implantĂ© les discriminations dans toutes les cultures, elles prennent des formes et des degrĂ©s diffĂ©rents, mais sont prĂ©sentes Ă  toutes les Ă©chelles, discriminations sur les religions, sur la couleur de peau, sur les origines, opinions. Toutes les diffĂ©rences entre individus sont des prĂ©textes supplĂ©mentaires pour ajouter de l’animositĂ© dans homo sapiens. Fort Ă  l’extĂ©rieur faible Ă  l’intĂ©rieur. Le XXĂšme siĂšcle sera pour tous un siĂšcle trĂšs mouvementĂ©. Il voit le jour avec l’apothĂ©ose des grands empires qui traduit la soif d’exploration de nouvelles contrĂ©es et de domination face Ă  lui-mĂȘme. Sa propre colonisation fera des ravages. Au dĂ©but du siĂšcle se produit un Ă©vĂ©nements que nous n’avons pas du tout imaginĂ©. La dĂ©couverte par des scientifiques de la relativitĂ© restreinte. Cette thĂ©orie scientifique est le premier pas vers la dĂ©couverte notre espĂšce mais Ă©galement de notre univers. Elle est la raison de ma mission sur Terre, car l’humain Ă©volue de plus en plus vite avec ce surplus d’énergie. Il lui reste beaucoup Ă  faire avant de le voir nous envahir. Mais si rien n’est fait il le fera pour sĂ»r avec au moins autant de cruautĂ© qu’il s’est infligĂ© Ă  lui-mĂȘme. DissipĂ© l’énergie apportĂ© par les Ă©nergies fossiles, telle est notre mission. Pour l’accomplir nous avons Ă©tudiĂ© la situation d’homo sapiens. Il s’est appropriĂ© toute sa planĂšte. Et dans le monde colonial qu’il s’est infligĂ©, plus aucun individu n’est indĂ©pendant vis Ă  vis de son semblable. GrĂące aux progrĂšs techniques notamment mais surtout Ă  l’idĂ©e grandissante de nation qui s’est diffusĂ©e avec la pĂ©riode des empires. Par un jeu d’alliance bien aiguiller de notre part, un conflit entre deux nations peut entraĂźner par effet domino des milliers voire des millions d’hommes vers un combat meurtrier. Une guerre mondiale, planĂ©taire. Nous avons dĂ©montrĂ© qu’il Ă©tait possible d’entraĂźner l’humanitĂ© toute entiĂšre dans un conflit sanglant et d’évaporĂ© toute l’énergie de notre victime dans sa propre perte. Cette guerre nous a fait beaucoup progresser, elle a ouvert une boĂźte de Pandore. Une course Ă  l’armement, un dĂ©veloppement de technologie jamais vu dans notre but de tuĂ© homo sapiens. Nous avons naturellement dĂ©cidĂ© de tout mettre en Ɠuvre pour laisser cette boĂźte ouverte. Nous nous sommes assurĂ©s de voir signer les traitĂ©s de paix les moins pacifistes qu’ils soient. Qui invitent Ă  la vengeance. Pour voir naitre nouvelle guerre mondiale. Nous avons imaginĂ© un nouveau schĂ©ma pour contrĂŽler les États. Au lieu d’une famille royale ou d’un systĂšme dĂ©mocratique, qui laisse peu de marge de manƓuvre pour nos conseillers. Nous avons imaginĂ© un systĂšme oĂč tous les pouvoirs reposeraient dans les mains d’un seul homme. Centraliser le pouvoir nous facilite la tĂąche. Dans les dĂ©mocraties ou la diversitĂ© d’opinion est importante, il nous faut convaincre beaucoup plus de monde pour arriver Ă  nos fins. Plus il y a de diversitĂ© moins la population du pays est mallĂ©able pour nous. A l’inverse plus le dictateur a une emprise sur sa population plus nous pouvons faire de grandes choses. Nous rĂ©duisons au maximum la diversitĂ© intellectuelle du pays en dupliquant l’idĂ©ologie du grand chef dans la tĂȘte de tous ses citoyens. Ainsi s’il saute d’une falaise c’est toute sa nation qui sautera avec lui, dans l’hypothĂšse oĂč la diversitĂ© cognitive ait Ă©tĂ© rĂ©duite Ă  zĂ©ro. Et au milieu du XXĂšme siĂšcle nous avons failli atteindre ce zĂ©ro. On a mĂȘme cru voir la fin d’homo sapiens. Nous avions acquis tellement de pouvoir avec nos dictateurs que nous n’avons mĂȘme pas eu de contestation Ă  la mise Ă  mort de dizaines de millions d’humains. Nous avons mis en place une organisation mĂ©thodique, une industrialisation de la mort, cela nous a Ă©tĂ© trĂšs compliquĂ©. Il a fallu diviser la tĂąche pour que chacun apporte une petite pierre au tombeau de l’humanitĂ©, tout en dissimulant le plus possible le rĂ©sultat final. Aussi il a fallu mettre en place un planning de la mort. En effet s’il ne se soucie pas de ce qu’il ne voit pas, l’humain ne peut pas vivre sans voir. Malheureusement l’humain reste un animal imprĂ©visible et nos dictateurs se sont laissĂ© avoir par leur soif primitive de domination. Et ont provoquĂ© leurs chutes en provoquant plus fort qu’eux. Certes elle a entraĂźnĂ© la mort de millions d’humains mais a fait faillir notre tentative de mise Ă  mort totale. Toutefois cette guerre mondiale nous a apportĂ© la clĂ© de notre mission. La bombe atomique. L’homme a dĂ©couvert la rĂ©action nuclĂ©aire en chaine, mais toute dĂ©couverte n’est pas bonne Ă  prendre surtout en temps de guerre ou le seul but est de tuĂ©. Ainsi cette dĂ©couverte sera immĂ©diatement mise Ă  disposition comme une nouvelle arme de destruction de masse. Une arme monstrueuse capable de rĂ©duire Ă  nĂ©ant des milliers de vie humaine en une fraction de seconde. Quel que soit le futur, cette arme est un pas en avant vers l’extinction d’homo sapiens. Cette arme est irrationnelle, Ă  l’image de la pĂ©riode Ă  laquelle elle a Ă©tĂ© crĂ©Ă©. Mais c’est une nouvelle boĂźte de Pandore qui s’est ouverte et cette boĂźte a changĂ© Ă  tout jamais notre approche de la mission. La prioritĂ© Ă©tant maintenant d’arrĂȘtĂ© Ă  tout prix homo sapiens quitte Ă  faire une impasse sur la vie sur Terre. AprĂšs cette guerre les humains ont mis en place une organisation mondiale censĂ©e ramener la paix et ne plus jamais se voir reproduire les horreurs passĂ©es. Et pourtant Ă  peine le conflit terminĂ© que des tensions internationales sont rĂ©apparues. Les traitĂ©s de paix ne viennent pas apporter la paix, mais encore une fois rĂ©compenser les vainqueurs, en leur donnant une position Ă  part dans l’organisation. Ils sont ancrĂ©s dans l’outil de paix et personne ne peut les arrĂȘter. Pour recrĂ©er un climat de tension et de mise en danger d’homo sapiens, nous avons distribuĂ© l’arme atomique Ă  de nombreuses nations pour que la prochaine guerre mondiale devienne nuclĂ©aire et rĂ©duise en poussiĂšre notre espĂšce ciblĂ©e. De plus nous travaillons depuis lors Ă  la mise en place de dictateurs aussi puissant que ceux d’antan mais avec le feu atomique toujours dans les mĂȘmes ambitions. Nous avons Ă  nouveau dirigĂ© les jeux d’alliance pour crĂ©e au rang mondial une bipolarisation du monde. PĂ©riode comparable au moyen Ăąge oĂč les religions se battaient pour imposer sa vĂ©ritĂ© aux autres. Il y eu beaucoup de conflits indirects entre les deux blocs, Ă  chaque fois nous pensons avoir accompli notre travail. Mais l’humain est si illisible que notre succĂšs est encore Ă  faire et la bombe atomique n’a pas encore Ă©tĂ© employĂ© Ă  grande Ă©chelle. Ces guerres nous ont quand mĂȘme donnĂ© une nouvelle carte en main en distribuant des millions d’armes de guerre Ă  un trĂšs grand nombre d’humains. Ce qui constitue un excellent terreau pour convertir Ă  l’échelle individuelle les conflits entre États, et utiliser toutes formes de discriminations pour faire pression sur la dĂ©tente. C’est dans ce contexte de chaos que j’ai Ă©tĂ© envoyĂ© en mission. Peu avant mon arrivĂ©e deux choses crĂ©e par l’homme, allaient bouleverser mon planning, internet et les smartphones. Ces deux inventions combinĂ©es ont permis Ă  l’homme moderne de faire une petite rĂ©volution qui est de connectĂ© en temps rĂ©el des centaines de millions d’individus. Et dans notre optique de casser les liens entre les individus cela nous a inquiĂ©tĂ©. En plus cette technologie s’est appliquĂ©e simultanĂ©ment dans tous les pays, pour tout le monde. Elle a mis en lumiĂšre des absurditĂ©s, fait trembler des dictatures, car n’importe qui peut partager au monde entier ce qu’il voit sans aucun filtre ni aucun dĂ©lai. Mais ce nouvel univers digital, nous l’avons su nous l’approprier. En effet l’internet rĂ©uni tous les humains, toutes les cultures car il ne possĂšde aucune restriction. Il rĂ©unit l’homme dans un univers fictif. C’est grĂące Ă  cette particularitĂ© qu’il peut ĂȘtre un outil trĂšs puissant. Étant donnĂ© qu’il n’est pas contrĂŽlĂ© notre anonymat en est garantie, de plus la maniĂšre de fonctionnement d’internet implique de stocker toutes sortes d’informations trĂšs prĂ©cises sur chacun des utilisateurs. Ces informations nous y avons accĂšs, et plus il y a d’humains sur internet plus notre connaissance dans homo sapiens s’affine. Ces informations nous montrent instantanĂ©ment les effets de nos influences sur la cible. Avec internet, les rĂ©seaux sociaux se sont progressivement dĂ©matĂ©rialisĂ©s. Nous les avons d’abord soumis aux jeunes humains qui sont nos cibles les plus influençables et le futur de l’humanitĂ©. Cette nouvelle arme que sont les rĂ©seaux sociaux nous a permis d’éloigner encore plus l’humain Ă  lui-mĂȘme, d’alimenter les tensions en son sein en dupliquant toutes les formes de discriminations dĂ©jĂ  prĂ©sentes dans le monde rĂ©el et en y ajoutant un nombre illimitĂ© de fausses informations. L’humain a rĂ©cemment fait Ă©voluer son monde d’interaction digitale avec des rĂ©seaux sociaux qui utilisent la mĂ©moire de court terme. Cette Ă©volution amplifie le phĂ©nomĂšne de bulle cognitive avec une rĂ©pĂ©tition intensive d’informations similaires et une augmentation du temps d’exposition Ă  ces rĂ©seaux de nouvelle gĂ©nĂ©ration. La mĂ©moire Ă  court terme ne laisse pas la place aux rĂ©flexions posĂ©es mais Ă  l’irrationalitĂ© et aux Ă©motions ce qui a tendance Ă  accentuer encore d’avantage l’addiction de l’individu. Nous sommes maintenant capables de mettre chaque individu dans sa bulle face Ă  son Ă©cran, de telle sorte qu’il n’y ait pas deux bulles similaires, qu’il n’y ait pas deux humains semblables. Qu’ils ne se reconnaissent plus pour qu’ils s’affrontent tous. En plus ces rĂ©seaux sociaux font apparaĂźtre leurs contenu grĂące Ă  un algorithme, ce qui permet de choisir ce qui sera vu par qui, quand et oĂč. Nous pouvons choisir qui ira dans quelle bulle. Ainsi pour notre plus grand bonheur l’humain nous a fait cadeau de l’outil de propagande le plus puissant jamais vu dans son existence. On a obtenu en quelque sorte une dĂ©matĂ©rialisation de la vie sociale d’homo sapiens, et une simplification de notre mission par la mĂȘme occasion. C’est notre nouveau moyen de pouvoir sur homo sapiens, et dans le futur nous allons le synchroniser avec les dictatures dĂ©jĂ  existantes. Ce cocktail explosif n’a que peu de chance d’aboutir Ă  une vraie fin pure et simple de l’espĂšce entiĂšre. Cela peut au plus lui apporter quelques Ă©gratignures. Tous ces artifices n’ont que vocation Ă  dĂ©tourner l’attention et Ă  dissiper au maximum l’énergie acquise grĂące aux Ă©nergie fossiles. Car durant tout ce temps Ă©coulĂ© l’humain a dĂ©ployĂ© une Ă©nergie folle pour se battre contre lui-mĂȘme et tous ces conflits lui ont apportĂ© des blessures qui finissent naturellement par cicatrisĂ©es et n’auront laissĂ© derriĂšre elles que quelques marques inutiles Ă  son existence. Alors que pour nous ces conflits sont un gaspillage d’énergie trĂšs intĂ©ressant car elle n’est pas utilisĂ©e pour son savoir et elle propage notre poison en quantitĂ© abondante. Notre poison est le rĂ©sultat de la combustion d’énergie fossile. Un gaz Ă  effet de serre trĂšs puissant. Il a Ă©tĂ© emprisonnĂ© par un long processus naturel long de plusieurs dizaines de millions d’annĂ©es. Et tous ce gaz Ă  effet de serre capturĂ© Ă  lentement changĂ© le climat sur Terre et a ainsi Ă  l’aide de la sĂ©lection naturelle fait Ă©voluer les diffĂ©rentes espĂšces dĂ©jĂ  prĂ©sentes. Les grands singes ont Ă©voluĂ© en homo sapiens indirectement grĂące au changement climatique trĂšs progressif apportĂ© avec la captation de carbone au fil du temps. Notre idĂ©e est essentiellement basĂ©e sur la destruction du travail de la nature. Et de maniĂšre trĂšs brutale de tel sorte qu’aucune espĂšce n’ait le temps d’évoluer. Comme pour la fin des dinosaures ou un changement climatique brusque, entraĂźner par un astĂ©roĂŻde, a provoquĂ© l’extinction d’une majeure partie de la biodiversitĂ© prĂ©sente et a Ă©liminĂ© dĂ©finitivement la majoritĂ© des espĂšces prĂ©sentes. En fait le dĂ©rĂšglement climatique ne tue pas directement homo sapiens, mais disparition des conditions de son apparition va provoquer sa propre perte. Nos calculs ont dĂ©montrĂ© qu’une espĂšce n’aura jamais la mĂȘme Ă©nergie que l’ensemble des espĂšces vivantes additionnĂ©s. Cela pour la simple et bonne raison qu’aucune espĂšce du monde vivant capte l’énergie de la mĂȘme maniĂšre et qu’aucune espĂšce n’est capable de capter l’énergie reçu par sa planĂšte de toutes les maniĂšres diffĂ©rentes. Certes le savoir d’homo sapiens lui a permis d’acquĂ©rir des technologies capables de capter de diffĂ©rentes maniĂšres de l’énergie, mais trĂšs rares sont les techniques qui sont aussi optimisĂ©es que des centaines de millions d’annĂ©es de sĂ©lection naturel. Ainsi chaque extinction d’espĂšces est autant d’énergie nĂ©cessaire pour remplacer sa fonction dans la biodiversitĂ© et prĂ©server un environnement hospitalier. Et ainsi plus le nombre d’espĂšces disparus est important plus il faut de l’énergie pour compenser leurs fonctions. C’est un cercle vicieux, si trop d’espĂšces disparaissent, homo sapiens perd toute l’énergie captĂ© par ces espĂšces, et en dĂ©pense infiniment plus pour remplacer leurs rĂŽles sur Terre. Et comme nous l’avons rendu dĂ©pend aux Ă©nergie fossiles la boucle est bouclĂ©e. L’extinction d’une espĂšce est une petite victoire pour nous car cela signifie que la Terre perd les conditions Ă  la survie de la biodiversitĂ© d’homo sapiens. Et donc le rapproche de sa disparition et la rĂ©ussite de notre deuxiĂšme piste, provoquer le changement brusque des conditions climatiques sur la planĂšte Terre et entraĂźner avec elle la disparition d’homo sapiens. J’ai compris mon travail, je vais influencer l’homme sur les rĂ©seaux sociaux. Mais pour moi avant de se lancer sur les rĂ©seaux sociaux, il faut se faire un rĂ©seau dans le monde rĂ©el pour comprendre un peu plus comment les humains en gĂ©nĂ©ral interagissent entre eux. Depuis ma prĂ©sence sur Terre mes Ă©changes sociaux ont Ă©tĂ© trĂšs restreins comme on me l’avait conseillĂ©. J’ai le sentiment que je suis assez grand que j’ai suffisamment d’expĂ©rience de la vie pour pouvoir contrĂŽler mes Ă©motions. Je pense que je peux me lancer Ă  discuter avec de nouvelles personnes. Je ne sais pas comment m’y prendre mais par mimĂ©tisme je progresse, et puis je suis encore entourĂ© d’amis. Donc j’échange avec de nouveaux humains mais je ne me suis pas vraiment mis au premier plan, je prĂ©fĂšre encore rester avec mes anciens copains. La peur de l’inconnu prime. Mais un monde inconnu m’intrigue plus que tout depuis un certain temps il n’est pas chez l’homme il est chez la femme. Je ne connais rien de ces personnes. Pourtant au plus profond de moi je ressens quelque chose d’indescriptible qui attire perpĂ©tuellement mon regard vers ces cheveux longs, vers ces silhouettes sublimes. Dans mon esprit ces trĂ©sors sont hors de portĂ©e d’un homme comme moi enfermĂ© sur lui-mĂȘme. Qui ne se reconnaĂźt mĂȘme pas dans un miroir. De plus la femme est l’ĂȘtre vivant interdit lors de nos missions, il a Ă©tĂ© rĂ©pertoriĂ© comme Ă©tant crĂ©ateur d’émotions incontrĂŽlables et donc extrĂȘmement dangereuses pour notre mission. Par nature l’homme est plus fort physiquement que la femme c’est lui qui dĂ©cide dans le monde d’homo sapiens. Nous avons donc aucun intĂ©rĂȘt a liĂ© des rĂ©seaux avec la femme vu qu’elle n’a aucun pouvoir sur la population, mieux vaut concentrer nos efforts sur l’homme. Et pourtant ce quelque chose au fond du moi humain m’as fait vouloir parler Ă  cet ĂȘtre inconnu. J’ai essayĂ© par le passĂ© Ă  m’adresser au visage, mais inexpĂ©rimentĂ© je n’ai jamais eu aucun retour. J’avais laissĂ© tomber cette idĂ©e et m’étais concentrĂ© sur ma quĂȘte. Et lĂ  sans prĂ©venir, soudainement tu es venue, je ne sais pas pourquoi mais tout de suite j’ai compris, que tu n’étais pas comme les autres. Pourtant je ne te connaissais pas je ne te scrutais pas comme les autres. Je n’ai jamais posĂ© mon regard sur toi, et ne t’ai jamais projetĂ© dans mon esprit comme je l’ai fait avec tant d’autres. Je ne connais mĂȘme pas ton prĂ©nom. Et pourtant toi, tu veux Ă  tout prix connaĂźtre le miens. Ma plus grande peur. J’ai Ă©tĂ© pris de cours surpris par les Ă©vĂ©nements. Et quand tu m’as montrĂ© ton intĂ©rĂȘt pour moi, je n’ai pas su rĂ©pondre. D’un cĂŽtĂ© si je refusais je provoquerais chez toi une forme de haine que j’ai dĂ©jĂ  pu observer par le passĂ© et qui peut nuire. De l’autre si j’accepte je dĂ©calerai cette fatalitĂ© Ă  plus tard, et subviendrai Ă  ce je ne sais quoi qui bouillonnait en moi. J’ai pris la deuxiĂšme option et Ă©tais assez confiant pour que cette mĂ©saventure se termine vite. J’ai pris tout de suite le plus de distance possible et j’étais Ă  peu prĂšs sĂ»r que ma personne te rĂ©pugnerait. J’ai commis de nombreuses erreurs qui t’ont blessĂ©es. C’est la premiĂšre fois de ma vie que je voyais directement les consĂ©quences de mes actes. Que je voyais que si je disais cela tu rĂ©agirais comme ceci. Au dĂ©but je tĂątonnais, il y a eu beaucoup de ratĂ©. Je n’étais pas sensible aux ratĂ©s je m’en rĂ©jouissais mĂȘme et espĂ©rai que tu te sĂ©parerais pour mettre fin Ă  mon erreur, et pour reprendre ma mission. Mais contre toute attente tu restais, sans savoir pourquoi tu restais mais tu Ă©tais lĂ  tout prĂšs de moi. J’avais l’impression que ma seule prĂ©sence t’apportait quelque chose d’incroyable. Elle dessinait sur ton visage un sourire que je n’avais encore jamais vu. Pour ma part ta prĂ©sence m’étonnait encore mais avec le temps j’ai fini par t’accepter. Chaque jour de plus avec toi Ă©tais une surprise pour moi, ma peur de faillir ma mission s’érodait peu Ă  peu, avec elle mon but de montĂ© un nouveau rĂ©seau s’arrĂȘtait. Et ce temps passĂ© auprĂšs de toi m’as permis de dĂ©couvrir l’autre sexe d’homo sapiens. La vie sur Terre pour toi est bien plus difficile que pour moi. L’homme Ă©tant plus fort physiquement, il a naturellement dominĂ© les premiers instants d’homo sapiens. Et depuis il n’a jamais lĂąchĂ© sa domination. Il a tout construit Ă  son modĂšle. Toutes les sociĂ©tĂ©s toutes les religions, tout a Ă©tĂ© construit par l’homme pour l’homme. Ainsi la vie sur Terre pour les femmes et bien plus compliquĂ© que pour nous. Et cette vĂ©ritĂ© m’a plutĂŽt choquĂ©. Pendant toutes ces annĂ©es les femmes ont Ă©tĂ© sur la touche du monde uniquement Ă  cause de leurs faiblesses physiques et elles le sont encore aujourd’hui. Mais ce que j’ai vu en toi c’est que cette faiblesse physique t’as formĂ© une force mentale que je n’ai vu nulle part ailleurs. Un esprit infiniment plus fort que le mien. En fait Ă  l’opposer de l’homme, la femme est faible Ă  l’extĂ©rieur mais forte Ă  l’intĂ©rieur. Cela doit ĂȘtre pour cette raison aussi que nous ne ciblons pas Ă  la femme dans nos missions. Quand je suis avec toi je ressens ton attention, je n’en avais jamais connu une pareil. Toute ma vie je suis restĂ© dans mon coin fermĂ©, je me plais bien avec moi-mĂȘme. Mais toi tu en as dĂ©cidĂ© autrement et Ă  chaque fois que tu en avais l’occasion tu venais te blottir contre moi. Et Ă  force de te voir, d’échanger avec toi, de partager des Ă©motions, non seulement je t’ai dĂ©couvert, mais en plus je me suis dĂ©couvert moi-mĂȘme tu as Ă©tĂ© mon miroir. Pour la premiĂšre fois dans ma vie j’ai pris conscience de qui j’étais et tu m’as donnĂ© confiance en qui j’étais. Et un jour la surprise aprĂšs tout ce que tu m’as montrĂ© de toi. Tu m’as montrĂ© ta dĂ©tresse intĂ©rieure que tu m’avais cachĂ©, que tu avais accumulĂ© avec toutes mes erreurs passĂ©es. Et pour la premiĂšre fois j’ai Ă©tĂ© Ă©mu, j’ai ressenti ce qui sommeillait au fond de moi, je tenais Ă  toi. Je tenais Ă  voir ton sourire sur ton visage, je tenais au regard bienveillant que tu me portais, je tenais Ă  te voir heureuse c’est ce que j’espĂ©rais profondĂ©ment chaque jour pour toi. Mais lĂ  tu m’as cachĂ© ton sourire. Alors j’ai dĂ©cidĂ© de changer et de m’ouvrir Ă  toi. Car mon dĂ©sir le plus profond c’était de revoir ce sourire encore et encore. C’est l’élixir de mon bonheur, ma raison de vivre. J’ai fait comme tu m’as appris, je me suis collĂ© Ă  toi je ne te regardais plus que toi. Tu Ă©tais mon tout Ă  mes yeux. Et nous Ă©tions heureux, j’ai mĂȘme appris Ă  sourire comme tu me l’as montrĂ©. Ma vie Ă©tait belle j’étais heureux comme je ne l’ai jamais Ă©tĂ© auparavant, heureux d’ĂȘtre un humain, tout allait bien. Je n’étais mĂȘme plus soucieux de ma mission. Mais comme pour toutes choses rien n’est infini et le temps nous a sĂ©parĂ©. Nos environnements nous ont façonnĂ©s diffĂ©remment si bien que les rares fois oĂč nous nous retrouvions, nous ne retrouvions plus cette magie passĂ©e. Ça m’a beaucoup affectĂ©, ce fut dur d’accepter que les bons moments passĂ©s ensemble Ă©taient derriĂšre nous. Ça m’a fait beaucoup souffrir, et longtemps j’ai refusĂ© de l’admettre. Je m’efforçais de croire que ce n’était qu’un passage, de continuĂ© comme si de rien n’était. Mais la vĂ©ritĂ© ma rattrapĂ© et j’ai vu que de dissimuler la vĂ©ritĂ© ne faisait que te blesser un peu plus fort chaque jour. Depuis longtemps je n’avais plus vu ton sourire. La fin de notre histoire, je n’en doutais pas une seconde. J’avais fini par m’y faire l’idĂ©e Ă  m’y prĂ©parer, mais quand allait elle arriver je n’en savais rien, le plus loin possible. Et puis le moment est arrivĂ©, aussi prĂ©visible soit-il. Aux premiers instants j’étais content pour toi, tu avais rĂ©ussi Ă  prendre une grande dĂ©cision, une dĂ©cision que je n’aurais jamais Ă©tĂ© capable de prendre moi-mĂȘme. Et puis nos chemins s’était sĂ©parĂ©, il Ă©tait prĂ©fĂ©rable de se sĂ©parer Ă  notre tour en se souhaitant le meilleur que de forcer le destin et se sĂ©parer en se souhaitant le pire. Mais de mon cĂŽtĂ© je n’avais jamais connu cette situation, j’étais habituĂ© Ă  recevoir une forme d’attention positive de ta part. Ma plus grande peur c’était de la voir disparaĂźtre, elle m’a permis d’avancer, d’avoir un repĂšre sur lequel poser mon regard pendant les tempĂȘtes. Alors j’ai continuĂ© de me comporter comme si de rien n’était, enfin presque je me forçais Ă  montrer un peu plus de distance dans nos Ă©changes mais je n’en pensais pas moins. Et puis la rĂ©alitĂ© m’a Ă©clatĂ© au visage aussi brute et violente. J’ai dĂ©couvert que tu m’avais remplacĂ©. Le choc fĂ»t violent, et j’ai senti une douleur que je n’avais jamais ressenti en plein cƓur, je venais pour la premiĂšre fois de ma vie sentir mon cƓur et cette douleur s’est rĂ©pandu dans tout mon corps. Elle m’a empĂȘchĂ© de dormir, retenue de manger mais surtout elle m’a repris ce que tu m’avais donnĂ©, elle m’a repris mon sourire. Et pour la premiĂšre fois je comprends comment l’humain est capable d’en arriver Ă  faire des folies envers lui-mĂȘme. Les Ă©motions qui le traversent sont trĂšs puissantes. Mais de toutes les Ă©motions connues, celle-ci est sans doute la plus forte. Je t’en voulais et cela me paraissait complĂštement lĂ©gitime. Dans ma tempĂȘte d’émotions je voulais faire resurgir ma violence intĂ©rieure. Je me sentais vide, sans savoir ni quoi faire ni Ă  qui parler, j’étais perdu. Et dans ma tristesse, j’ai prĂ©fĂ©rĂ© me refermer encore une fois sur moi-mĂȘme. Le monde qui m’entoure m’a paru triste. À mes yeux tout ce malheur n’était que de ta faute. Puis un jour, j’ai vu par hasard une photo de vous deux. Et lĂ  sur ton visage j’ai vu ce sourire, ton sourire. Ça a Ă©tĂ© pour moi le signe que tu Ă©tais heureuse comme tu as Ă©tĂ© heureuse avec moi. Et ce sourire m’a rappelĂ© Ă  quel point tu m’as rendu heureux Ă  quel point tu m’as apportĂ© beaucoup de choses, et je m’en suis voulu. J’ai voulu blesser la personne qui m’a donnĂ© tant. Qui m’as appris pourquoi je suis lĂ , pourquoi nous sommes lĂ . Qui m’as appris ce que le mot amour signifiait. Qui m’a donnĂ© conscience qu’avant d’ĂȘtre un espion, je suis un humain. Tu m’as donnĂ© ton amour, tu m’as appris Ă  aimer avec le cƓur et c’est la plus belle chose que j’ai connu. Et cette chose aussi belle que l’amour entre les humains est la raison de notre Ă©chec face Ă  homo sapiens. Car l’amour, aussi longtemps qu’existera la vie, soignera toutes les plais et l’humanitĂ© en ressortira toujours plus belle. Alors si j’écris ce livre, c’est pour te rendre hommage, pour rendre Ă  l’humanitĂ© toute entiĂšre l’amour que tu as su me donner. Tu m’as montrĂ© ce qui reposait au fond de moi, au fond de tous les humains, l’amour. Et c’est cet amour-lĂ  qui m’a changĂ©, qui m’a fait croire en l’humanitĂ©, qui m’a montrĂ© quel est son but dans sa courte vie. Nous ne sommes lĂ  que pour s’aimer, aimer l’humanitĂ©. Pour ton anniversaire, et jusqu’au restant de mon existence je montrerai au monde entier l’amour que tu as su me donner pour moi, pour l’humanitĂ©. Et Pour toute cette histoire et bien plus encore, merci Julie.
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