Is kiran bhatt alive

​
Before I was born, I was in a state where I didn't have any kind of problem, then one fine day these two horny guys allowed themselves to take me out of this state without my consent and put me in a reality full of violence, hatred, useless fights, illnesses, deaths, with some good things ok, but absolutely no comparison with the bad ones, all this for their own sordid selfishness and in their own interest, to brag to their friends, to their relatives, to be approved by society, certainly not in my interest: I did not have any kind of problem where I was. Not only could I not decide to be born and I have no responsibility to be alive, but I cannot even decide to leave, suicide is so difficult and painful, they have put me in a trap, a sadistic, abominable, useless and absolutely unjustified torture in which I am obliged to fight every day until death chained by stupid instincts for their own sake. Everyone tells me: 'you have to do this, no one will help you, you have to do this...' no, I DON'T HAVE to do anything, because it is not me who decided to be here, why should I be forced to do anything? To procreate is like abusing an innocent child, who cannot defend himself and cannot give consent, all for your own perverse and selfish pleasure, which will make him suffer, it is the act that generates all evil, it is the most evil act that can exist, worse than murder, r*pe, etc...(acts that exist only because someone made it possible for someone to exist in order to be able to do them). I will never forgive you, never!!! Sorry for the outburst, but I couldn't hold it in any longer....

sometimes i feel like i’ve just hit my breaking point. i thought it was going to get better for me in the past year or so, and i’ve tried so hard to take care of myself mentally but i feel like i am just incapable of doing so.
i was “talking” to someone around sep-nov of last year, in a typical moving-too-fast lesbian fashion, and it ended horribly. i communicated multiple times that being purposefully ignored is incredibly hard for me to deal with and they continued to do so after apologizing and never changed their behavior. in hindsight it’s very obvious to me i was being used in a myriad of ways, but i was obsessed with having just someone around to cling onto that i just let them walk all over me. (i also have to mention that the deliberate ignoring on their part was only a fraction of what they did/said to me).
we were never even in an official relationship and it still destroyed me. they mocked me after i had told them that they were being vague and confusing and i just wanted them to be honest with their feelings for me because it was hurtful and it just hurt me even more. for once in my life i had wrote something coherent, something that perfectly conveyed my feelings about a situation and it was just shut down and labeled as ridiculous and they “didn’t know why i was making a big deal out of it.”
i don’t know how much more i can take. it’s june now, this happened 6 months ago and it still eats me alive. i’m just tired of being treated like shit, i’m tired of being used for whatever people need, i feel like all i am is someone they come to in order to dump all of their problems onto and walk away without a second thought. i am always there for people when they need me and encourage all of my friends to talk to me about anything, because i want to listen and give advice, but no one has done that for me. not a single person. i feel so alone and stupid, i feel dumb for even letting this still effect me, i feel like i’m too difficult for people to waste their time on in romantic relationships.
i just want patience, i want someone to be patient and gentle with me, or even just a little bit more understanding than they are right now. i feel like i’m not asking for very much.

pain is apart of love, unfortunately getting hurt in love is apart of it love is weird and you must become hurt to find love you must become broken to find love, if you ask me why I couldn’t answer because I don’t know it’s just what I learn from getting hurt and falling in love over and over again and getting hurt over and over again, but I can explain it a little bit I guess being broken isn’t a weaknesses we won’t be fixed from getting hurt we just find people that fills the cracks of our hearts and helps us tape ourselves up until next time we get hurt, and it will hurt more and more but we always find people to help us understand that it’s okay to be hurt it’s okay to be ourselves, it’s okay to be you it’s okay to show that you are hurt it’s okay to ask for help it’s okay everything will be okay with the right people around you, and once you find that person for you it’s gonna be easy to tell them everything and anything and you won’t think about what they will say they won’t dismiss your feelings or tell you, you don’t matter because their heart is made to love you and they won’t see anything wrong with you they will see you for you and nothing else your past won’t matter, nothing will matter but you to them they will look at you with love and nothing else they’ll be excited to talk to you, to see you, to hug you, and I know we all want that we all do if someone says they don’t they are lying because we all want that I know I do, and unfortunately, we have to get hurt and get broken to find it we must get lost to be found we must become cold to become warm you must become you to be you you must hurt to be loved you, you must break to be fixed and it sucks it does it really does but your tears your hurt Is all being heard by god and he will send you someone to love you, as much as you love them and unfortunately we have to wait until our hearts are ready to accept that kind of love, and you might think you are ready but god might say otherwise god will make you wait and he will test you in many ways before he gives you what you prayed for, love is waiting, love is hurt, love is everything we want in life, you gonna be hurt, you can’t be afraid of hurt you can’t run away from it, it’s just gonna hurt you more if you do we have to accept that you will get hurt in love and you will cause it, it’s gonna suck regardless no matter what you choose you will get hurt one way or the other no matter what path you choose there’s no path without hurt, every path has hurt along it we travel along paths and we will end up hurt we travel with hurt hearts and love find us to repair us for the next path, healing regards some type of love if it’s temporary or permanent it’s gonna find you and it will hurt if it’s permanent, it’s gonna hurt there’s always gonna be hurt in everything, we do in love is gonna have hurt everything we say will carry hurt behind, it every we want will have hurt behind it we cannot hide from hurt because it will find us in every way it can, hurt is apart of us and some will use that hurt to hurt people and some will use it to help people, some will stayed in it and never say anything about it just remember every decision you make will cause you hurt in one way or the other, might not be immediately but it will bring hurt close behind and remember that you have people behind you regardless of what decision, you make I’ll be here forever and ever as long as I’m alive on the earth I’ll be here for you and anytime you need me.

pain is apart of love, unfortunately getting hurt in love is apart of it love is weird and you must become hurt to find love you must become broken to find love, if you ask me why I couldn’t answer because I don’t know it’s just what I learn from getting hurt and falling in love over and over again and getting hurt over and over again, but I can explain it a little bit I guess being broken isn’t a weaknesses we won’t be fixed from getting hurt we just find people that fills the cracks of our hearts and helps us tape ourselves up until next time we get hurt, and it will hurt more and more but we always find people to help us understand that it’s okay to be hurt it’s okay to be ourselves, it’s okay to be you it’s okay to show that you are hurt it’s okay to ask for help it’s okay everything will be okay with the right people around you, and once you find that person for you it’s gonna be easy to tell them everything and anything and you won’t think about what they will say they won’t dismiss your feelings or tell you, you don’t matter because their heart is made to love you and they won’t see anything wrong with you they will see you for you and nothing else your past won’t matter, nothing will matter but you to them they will look at you with love and nothing else they’ll be excited to talk to you, to see you, to hug you, and I know we all want that we all do if someone says they don’t they are lying because we all want that I know I do, and unfortunately, we have to get hurt and get broken to find it we must get lost to be found we must become cold to become warm you must become you to be you you must hurt to be loved you, you must break to be fixed and it sucks it does it really does but your tears your hurt Is all being heard by god and he will send you someone to love you, as much as you love them and unfortunately we have to wait until our hearts are ready to accept that kind of love, and you might think you are ready but god might say otherwise god will make you wait and he will test you in many ways before he gives you what you prayed for, love is waiting, love is hurt, love is everything we want in life, you gonna be hurt, you can’t be afraid of hurt you can’t run away from it, it’s just gonna hurt you more if you do we have to accept that you will get hurt in love and you will cause it, it’s gonna suck regardless no matter what you choose you will get hurt one way or the other no matter what path you choose there’s no path without hurt, every path has hurt along it we travel along paths and we will end up hurt we travel with hurt hearts and love find us to repair us for the next path, healing regards some type of love if it’s temporary or permanent it’s gonna find you and it will hurt if it’s permanent, it’s gonna hurt there’s always gonna be hurt in everything, we do in love is gonna have hurt everything we say will carry hurt behind, it every we want will have hurt behind it we cannot hide from hurt because it will find us in every way it can, hurt is apart of us and some will use that hurt to hurt people and some will use it to help people, some will stayed in it and never say anything about it just remember every decision you make will cause you hurt in one way or the other, might not be immediately but it will bring hurt close behind and remember that you have people behind you regardless of what decision, you make I’ll be here forever and ever as long as I’m alive on the earth I’ll be here for you and anytime you need me.

pain is apart of love, unfortunately getting hurt in love is apart of it love is weird and you must become hurt to find love you must become broken to find love, if you ask me why I couldn’t answer because I don’t know it’s just what I learn from getting hurt and falling in love over and over again and getting hurt over and over again, but I can explain it a little bit I guess being broken isn’t a weaknesses we won’t be fixed from getting hurt we just find people that fills the cracks of our hearts and helps us tape ourselves up until next time we get hurt, and it will hurt more and more but we always find people to help us understand that it’s okay to be hurt it’s okay to be ourselves, it’s okay to be you it’s okay to show that you are hurt it’s okay to ask for help it’s okay everything will be okay with the right people around you, and once you find that person for you it’s gonna be easy to tell them everything and anything and you won’t think about what they will say they won’t dismiss your feelings or tell you, you don’t matter because their heart is made to love you and they won’t see anything wrong with you they will see you for you and nothing else your past won’t matter, nothing will matter but you to them they will look at you with love and nothing else they’ll be excited to talk to you, to see you, to hug you, and I know we all want that we all do if someone says they don’t they are lying because we all want that I know I do, and unfortunately, we have to get hurt and get broken to find it we must get lost to be found we must become cold to become warm you must become you to be you you must hurt to be loved you, you must break to be fixed and it sucks it does it really does but your tears your hurt Is all being heard by god and he will send you someone to love you, as much as you love them and unfortunately we have to wait until our hearts are ready to accept that kind of love, and you might think you are ready but god might say otherwise god will make you wait and he will test you in many ways before he gives you what you prayed for, love is waiting, love is hurt, love is everything we want in life, you gonna be hurt, you can’t be afraid of hurt you can’t run away from it, it’s just gonna hurt you more if you do we have to accept that you will get hurt in love and you will cause it, it’s gonna suck regardless no matter what you choose you will get hurt one way or the other no matter what path you choose there’s no path without hurt, every path has hurt along it we travel along paths and we will end up hurt we travel with hurt hearts and love find us to repair us for the next path, healing regards some type of love if it’s temporary or permanent it’s gonna find you and it will hurt if it’s permanent, it’s gonna hurt there’s always gonna be hurt in everything, we do in love is gonna have hurt everything we say will carry hurt behind, it every we want will have hurt behind it we cannot hide from hurt because it will find us in every way it can, hurt is apart of us and some will use that hurt to hurt people and some will use it to help people, some will stayed in it and never say anything about it just remember every decision you make will cause you hurt in one way or the other, might not be immediately but it will bring hurt close behind and remember that you have people behind you regardless of what decision, you make I’ll be here forever and ever as long as I’m alive on the earth I’ll be here for you and anytime you need me.

When I first met her 8 years ago I thought she was gorgeous and that my cousin really lucked out because she was witty, incredibly smart and personal, and super fun to be around too. The more I got to know her, the more I liked her. 7 years ago they got engaged and even though there had never been anything between her and I, my gut hurt like a heartbreak and I realized just how much my feelings for her had snowballed into more than I bargained for. I was insanely jealous and thought about sabotaging their relationship because I wanted a chance with her. I never did it, but the thought crossed my mind. 6 years ago, my cousin confided in me that he had been interested in the swinger lifestyle and was contemplating bringing it up with her. They weren't married yet. He didn't want to scare her away but he also was worried it would affect their engagement if he brought it up. I encouraged him to, and not for selfish reasons. I honestly thought that if she truly loved him then she would consider his kink interest in swinging. If she gave him a hard no, then would he really want to spend the rest of his life with someone who wouldn't at least compromise somehow? Idk. I thought it made sense.
Anyway. He proposed the lifestyle to her and learned that she was not only interested, she was polyamorous and had been too nervous to bring it up for fear it would affect their engagement. Great. Just my fucking luck. 2 months later they are visiting me for a long weekend when we all had a friday off work. We decided to re-live childhood fun by making a giant blanket fort to watch a movie in and order take out. So at this point my cousin and I were both 29, she was 28(just a few months younger than myself). My cousin insisted that we need popcorn so he was going to make a quick trip to the store for popcorn and snacks. As he left, he joked that he knew his fiancee thought I was hot, and that I'd better take "really good care of her" before he gets back and winked at me. I laughed thinking he was just trying to make a cheesy joke but then he pulled out his phone and set an alarm, showing me, and said that I only had about 1 hour so I'd better "make it worth it".
She was in the living room setting up while he said this to me at the front door. I thought it was a really bizarre way to joke because he wasn't normally like that. And the it clicked.... they must think I'm willing to get involved sexually with her. I walled the 19 feet to the living room and rounded the corner to find her half naked, jeans draped on the sofa, pulling her shirt up to expose her stomach. She said she knew I was attracted to her, and then told me she was interested in me too and that she knew this must be so out of the blue, but that she wanted me so badly. My cock had never been so hard so fast. All I though was No, this is not okay, this is not how I wanted to get her. She kept talking though, telling me that she knew this must be a bit odd but that they were opening up their relationship and she had permission to "fool around" with me.... if I was interested.
Now when I say her tongue was down my throat in an instant, that's an understatement. The speed at which I grabbed her to kiss and pull against me felt like I hadn't even let her finish what she was saying. I could not believe it. It was like a too-good-to-be-true porno. We were frantically undressing each other, grabbing, kissing, biting holy fuck I didn't know I was into being bit. I could feel how wet she was against my leg when she rubbed up on me and I had to taste her. As soon as I started eating her out she stopped me, repositioned herself so we could 69 and God fucking dammit I have never had such amazing head. Within 3 minutes we were fucking. Every surface in my living room that day was christened and she told me repeatedly how much she had lusted after me and was so scared to bring it up, and how she couldn't believe she had been "missing out on this" this whole time. I naively responded much to the same sentiment and we damn well made the absolute most of that hour.
Just revisiting that memory has me rock solid.
The 3 of us talked that night about their lifestyle and the agreements they had in place, and how they both trusted me etc.. basically their agreement with each other includes that any sexual partners one or the other has must be approved by each other, ahead of time, and never in secret.
My issue is that, they got married that year, but she was having doubts about getting married and was afraid to pull out of the wedding because of family pressure. Yet, her and I have continued to have sex every chance we can.... and my cousin doesn't know.
His wife is having an affair, with me. I don't know how to stop, I don't even want to stop. It's been 6 years now and the guilt is eating me alive. My cousin is one of my best friends, I truly don't want him to hurt, and here I'm the asshole that's fucking his wife. I want her to leave him, and she wants to, but they had a kid together unplanned(broken condom) and she feels obligated to stay. I feel like I'm in love with her. I feel more committed to her than I ever was to my last girlfriend of 7+ years. I just want to end the agony of keeping everything so fucking secret and dishonest to my family, but I don't know where to start. I cannot stop thinking about her, fantasizing, it's driving me insane.

Hey,
You know how one day you are just a person with your whole life planned and on the docket with that "one" person who you thought would stay, only to find yourself standing at the crossroads of shattered dreams, watching as the certainties of your existence unravel before your eyes. Who you thought would hold you when the frenzy hurricane starts rumbling inside you. Who you thought would not let you be heartsick and heartbroken, the one who was supposed to make you feel like slab, unmovable and unbothered by silly little things life throws at you. But alas, you just felt a pebble, easily replaceable and thrown away.
I always thought death is the biggest loss anyone could experience. In most cases, it is indeed. But you know what is arguably the biggest or 2nd biggest feeling of loss - it is when you lose someone by choice. You lose someone who is alive and well, yet unable to mend things. I know it's hard, it's harder to live by it day by day. The constant anxiety, the uncalled panic, the sudden burst of emotions drowning you with the memories.
But you should probably know that this impending doom is temporary. I want to remind you that life, even in its most painful moments, still holds beauty. It's often in times like these, when our hearts are broken and our spirits are heavy, that we become acutely aware of the fragility and fleeting nature of life. Each day the memories will blur a little more, the pain will hurt a bit less, you will smile a lot wider and the life that you planned earlier will be a distant memory.
I know it may feel impossible to imagine this right now but life has an extraordinary way of mending our brokenness and guiding us towards something better. I hope you realise your capacity to love is infinite, and as you heal, you will find that love is not a finite resource. In the depths of your heartache, seek solace in the symphony of connections that intertwine your life.
And you know how one day you are just a person with your whole life planned ahead and on the docket with that "one" person who you thought would stay. I hope you understand that the "one" you really need to stay is "You". The "You" who hadn't lost herself in this crazy stupid world.
With love and care, V

Proof.
I dabbled in UpWork for about a year and a half and made around $2,000 in total. I started taking UpWork seriously in Jan 2023 and just hit $30k billing. That might not sound like a lot to some, but I think it's pretty decent. For reference, I do copywriting, marketing, and lead generation.
Here are some thoughts in no particular order.
- You have to have the right mindset. I thought "mindset" stuff was all bullshit until I did shift my mindset and it completely changed my work and life - no hyperbole. So some of the below has a lot to do with Mindset.
- 90% of UpWork is trash. As someone that has been a freelancer and a job poster, this is true on both sides. You need to accept that fact and realize this means two things: 1) You can skip 90% of the postings and not waste your time. 2) At least 90% of other freelancers aren't your competition.
- Raise your prices. Low-paying clients are the worst and most demanding. Why wouldn't you just raise your price, work for better clients, work fewer hours, and make more money? If you think you can't charge more for your service then 1) Increase your skills, or 2) Find a service that is more valuable to businesses.
- You set your price. Similar to the above, you get to choose how much you charge for your work. Sometimes I get clients that respond with "Your fee is too high" or "I just need X." I tell them to come back to me when they have a higher budget for the price.
- Work with people who have money. Pretty obvious, if a lemonade stand on the side of the road wants a full marketing campaign done, they aren't going to have the money to pay you.
- Understand how people with money think. I'm by no means rich, but there's a difference in thinking when you have more money than less. There is usually an inverse coloration between how much money someone has and how much time they have.
When you have no money, you always want to get the value. When you have money to spend, you just want to pay someone and have them complete it with as little input from you as possible so you don't have to spend any of your time. You want to go after this latter group of clients.
- Raise your prices. So important I had to list it twice. The amount you can charge has no relation to where you live. Your price should be based on the value you can bring someone.
- Change the power dynamic with your clients. I had a "sales call" last week where the prospect said, "Convince us why we should work with you." I responded with something like "I'm not here to convince anyone. I'm here to learn about your business and see if we're a good fit. If we are, we can take it from there."
If you go into a "sales call" with the mindset of 1) I can walk away from this, and 2) This call is for them to sell me on why I should work with them, you'll have much more confidence and sales will be much easier. I understand turning down clients is only possible when you already have a steady stream of income, but regardless, going into sales calls with this mindset will help you.
- Do valuable work. If you're trying to sell a service that doesn't make a big impact on your client, you can't charge that much. I can make $5k+ net per client because I help them make $50k+.
- Sell outcomes. Similar to the previous point, you shouldn't focus on your service as much and should focus more on the outcome you can bring to a client. Spending money on "blog articles" is an expense, but developing a content strategy that will get the client traffic and qualified leads is an investment. It's more or less the same kind of work, but it's all about how you position yourself.
- Take UpWork seriously. I'm sure no one consciously thinks they don't take UpWork seriously, but many do. If you want to work with serious professionals and make serious money, you need to be serious. This means sending out good proposals, getting on a call with the client, writing out a contract, following up, etc... If you don't take UpWork seriously, you're going to get crushed by those who do.
- Get another lead gen system in place. You can get booted off UpWork at any time, so I'm working on other client acquisition methods. I'm currently putting together a book funnel.
- Get your money. If it's a fixed-price job, demand at least 1/2 upfront funded and released before starting work. If a client doesn't want to do this, they are probably not very experienced.
- UpWork fees aren't that bad. UpWork taking 10% of your money sucks. But your other option is to use something like Stripe which takes 2.9% and worry about chasing down your money or getting late payments. This fee can also be considered a client acquisition cost. Bake this into your pricing.
- Client red flags.
🚩I just need XYZ.
🚩I need this done yesterday.
🚩The last few freelancers didn't work out and I had to fire them.
🚩I could do this myself but, XYZ.
🚩If you do this for a low price, I'll have much more work for you in the future.
🚩This is a commission-only job.
🚩Very low budgets.
- The bidding system is a blessing for everyone that does take UpWork seriously. When I was starting out, I thought the bidding system was a scam. After hiring a few people on UpWork, I realize it's the only way to keep the platform alive.
The money you spend on UpWork is a lead generation expense. That means you should bake that into your pricing for clients as well as compare that to other lead generation expenses.
Let's look at some math.
Let's say you want to use Facebook Ads to get clients. First, you'll need to figure out how to do Facebook ads and lose money figuring out how they work. But let's assume you already figured out Facebook ads.
You need to make creatives and write copy. You need to know who to target. You need to set up a lander with a lead gen form. You need to follow up on those leads.
Just some conservative back-of-the-napkin math and we're looking at $0.25 per click with a 10% lead fill form and we're already at $2.50 to get someone to fill out a lead gen form. That number is very conservative and doesn't include the time spend and the falloff that comes with following up. And hoping your lead actually has a project they need help with in the next 30 days or so.
But on UpWork, I can pay ~$5 to get my pitch directly in front of someone who needs a project now. Lately, my typical net per client is $5k. If I send out 100 good proposals at $5 per and I get a very low closing rate of 1%, I've spent $500 to make $5,000.
I'll take that deal every single day of the week. And because I can spend $500 to acquire a customer, I can spend that money to jump ahead of everyone else that isn't making enough money to afford that or isn't taking UpWork seriously enough to spend that.
- No excuses. "But English isn't my native language," "but I'm not from the US," "but another reason." I admit being an educated white native English speaker gives me advantages when it comes to a prospect's perception. But you gotta work with what you got. It's either that or sitting around complaining about why you're not getting clients.
- Raise your prices. Seriously. Just do it.
​

To take a momentary break from lewd comments about Andorians, I'd like to recommend the following book: Redshirts, by John Scalzi. Trying not to spoil it beyond what the back of the book already says, the main characters are lower deckers on a ship much like the Enterprise, but over time they figure out that something is very wrong with the world that they live in. The bridge crew always come back alive from their away missions, but the extras brought along always have something awful happen to them. It's quite funny for the first 75% or so, although by the end it changes tone and gets a bit philosophical and maudlin.

hey sexies,
i've been visiting family in Mexico and Honduras for the past three weeks and my legs have been eaten alive!!! i've never had an issue with bug bites, my legs have always been pretty clear until now. i already see these bites healing into rlly dark brown spots on my legs and ankles, front and back of my legs!
what can i do to alleviate the hyperpigmentation during the summer that is looming?? im not gonna stop wearing short bottoms, its too damn hot, and this is my first time dealing with hyperpigmentation on my legs. i tan pretty easily, so i know these marks will be dark. any tips for dealing with this hyperpigmentation at home (without professionals, i cant afford it) AND future bug bites would be so appreciated!! i don't want pls don't mention DEET, it literally makes my skin feel on fire and get so red! tyia!!

--
--
Marc gave it another go. He tipped his hand forward. The silver patty rolled off him, dropping toward the cave floor.
It stopped short of hitting the path. The shiny disc halted in the air, dangling at the end of a thin white line.
He watched the small wheel spin. It might have been the most fun he’d had all year. Even more fun than that mud puddle he’d found the other day.
How does it keep going? Marc thought to himself. And without any power??
Marc assumed the disc was some sort of technological marvel from the past. But the Archives had little information on it, only a name. It was called a “yo-yo.”
They all must have had one of these, he posited.
As Marc walked down the stone ramp, he cast the yo-yo again. The toy’s quiet spin was the only sound in the cavern. The soft hiss of string versus metal reverberated gently in the spacious cave.
Marc focused all his attention on the little gadget. He was determined to enjoy every last minute of the universe, no matter what. And that evening, the yo-yo more than accomplished that goal.
The shimmering yo-yo, however, couldn’t prevent the world around him from crumbling. The ground started to rumble. The rest of the cave shook with it. The underground city shook as the plasma storm above battered it—and the rest of the planet.
Marc’s home broke down. Cracks appeared in the ceiling. Waterfalls of dust poured out of them. It wouldn't be long before the whole thing collapsed. That is, if the plasma storm didn’t swallow it whole first.
Whatever.
A few clumps of dirt wouldn’t ruin Marc’s fun. He pulled the hood of his shawl over his head and extended his ragged sleeves toward each hand. His clothes shielded him from the falling dust; the gritty particles made themselves at home on his messy shawl. And Marc was free to perfect his newest trick.
The rumbling died down though as Marc descended the ramp. The yo-yo string didn’t wobble so much, and he didn't have to watch his steps as carefully. He just hoped the quaking wouldn’t come back to ruin his event.
Speaking of which, Marc glanced ahead toward his destination below. What he saw rocked him even harder than the earthquake had.
What in the sinkpits…?
Marc stopped in his tracks. He even started to reach for his knife. All because he’d detected a speck of something suspicious. Something he didn't see much of every day: color.
Showy landmarks weren’t something endemic to his home. The Outpost was more of a dusty gray-and-brown sort of place. The walls were sandstone. The floor was sandstone. And the ceiling? …Granite?
No, sandstone. All under the faint glow of a string of depressed lightbulbs.
The intriguing blip in the gray-and-tan collage was farther up the path. Ahead of the ramp, on Level 8, Marc saw the same three steel doors he was used to seeing. The front doors of underground homes, lined up in a row, each closed into the cave wall.
However, there was something different about the third door. It looked… alive. Like it didn’t belong in a dreary place like the Outpost. But it was too far away to tell what exactly had been done to it.
Marc squinted at it suspiciously. The third door happened to be his destination. And now it was weird.
He considered waiting and observing the mutated door. A child of the Outpost, Marc had developed a healthy fear of the unusual.
These habits, along with his instincts, kept him safe. They’d specifically preserved him while the rest of humanity perished.
But he shrugged off the instinct to wait. Something new and “different” was ahead, and he wanted to see it.
But just as a precaution, it was time for his yo-yo’s last trick. He got in one final throw then placed the toy into his satchel. He dropped it on top of his arsenal of cables, wrenches, and screwdrivers.
And by the time he’d snapped the satchel shut, the long ramp had bottomed out. He’d made it to the next level.
To his left, the wall had been spray-painted. Scrawled-out black letters stood against the sandy background. They stated, “Now Level 8.”
Marc followed the sign. He stayed close to the wall, crossing to the stone pedestrian path. He passed one untouched steel door with a dusted-over mail slot in the wall beside it. Then he passed a second home—abandoned like the first. And finally, he arrived at his friend’s place and the mysterious blip on Level 8.
To his surprise, the steel door elicited a flush of emotion. His heart floated upward. And the portrait before him drew his focus in like an otherworldly beacon.
How did it get so…?
Marc pulled back his hood. The ground popped with the sandy grains he released.
He could hardly believe the difference. The door used to blend in with the others: another ridged steel face that spent most of its time rusting or collecting dirt.
But it was no longer muffled by the dust and dirt that had built up over the years.
Today, it sung. Paint streaks flew across its visage. They swirled and spiraled, forming stars and other shapes. Where previously gray and rust dominated, colors sprang forth—colors that Marc didn't even have the names for. They were many, and they were warm, like the evening sky just after sunset. Marc could hardly wrap his head around the entire image.
He swelled with gratitude.
Only you could have pulled this off. He thought of his friend, the painter. The one person in the colony who’d ever been any fun. The one other person in the colony who was left…
The artist had done the unthinkable. Foraging the garden below for something other than food. Spending work time measuring and concocting the perfect blends of paint. And then slathering their fingers across the giant door, until its old face was but a memory. And all that effort for only a single other person to appreciate.
Newly inspired, Marc searched for an unpainted space on the metal canvas. He found one and knocked on the door.
He took a step back and waited. The outside of the Outpost was lively. Excited wind rushed through the canyon.
By contrast, the Outpost itself was silent. If there was anyone left to say anything, they may have even called it “dead.”
Or nearly dead, anyway. The last morsel of it came to life as the door in front of Marc groaned.
It floated off the ground, inching upward. On the other side, Marc could hear a hand crank clicking away.
Ktch… ktch… ktch… ktch…
The corrugated door lifted, and the door rolled up. The tip of the artist’s painting started to slip from view.
Ktch… ktch… ktch… ktch…
Behind the door, chains reeled at a slow clip. The heavy curtain was halfway up. Marc could now see his best friend's lower half. Buff Lenorkian legs pumped back and forth with each crank.
The door unveiled even more of the owner. A torso in a metal suit appeared. Four ripped arms stretched out of it. They rotated, moving to the clicking beats of the door.
Ktch… ktch… ktch… ktch…
The door raised a few inches further, uncovering the bottom half of a cobalt blue face. Two rows of razor-sharp teeth smiled from ear to ear. A few inches more, and Marc could see the whole of the Lenorkian’s face.
Sid greeted Marc as the last of the door raised.
“Finally!” he said.
Marc didn’t get a chance to respond. His body lurched forward involuntarily. He slammed into Sid’s metal suit.
Crrrrrick!
The armor squealed as Sid’s upper two arms squeezed him tighter. The lower set of arms had reeled Marc in.
Marc hated hugs. Stupid mushy emotional wraparounds. But just this one final time, Marc returned the gesture. He squeezed Sid back.
“Happy Worlds’ End!” Sid said from the other side of the embrace.
“Yeah,” Marc replied, “Happy Worlds’ End.”
The two separated.
“Cool painting, by the way,” Marc said. He pointed at the rolled-up door. “I didn’t think you’d top the one in the garden.”
“You think so?” Sid sheepishly smiled. “Well I’ve had more time to practice since… you know.”
“Yeah, I get it,” Marc said. “Me too. That’s how I actually got you something.”
Marc swung his heavy satchel around. He rifled through it, squeezing through cables, knocking handles and parts out of the way. And then—ah.
He fished out a crumpled rag. Holding it in one hand, he began to gently unfold it.
“I found this a few days ago in the garden,” he said. The edges of the cloth fell. They revealed a small, glass object. It sparkled.
Marc continued, “I think it fits your style—I mean, I know it’s a little smudged and chipped but...”
He swirled the crystal trinket around. The cavern’s incandescent light flittered across its clear edges.
He touched it too, tracing the slender portion of it with his thumb. It was the neck of the crystal swan.
“It’s yours,” Marc said, offering up the bird.
Sid cupped two shovel-sized hands and accepted the gift.
“It’s beautiful…” he said, examining it. “I can’t believe anything like this could have survived this long.” He looked up at Marc and smiled, “Thank you so much. I just wish I had a little longer to could enjoy it.”
They chuckled lightly about their impending obliteration.
“Well, come on in,” Sid said. He extended both of his left arms. They gestured toward the cave interior. “We’ll finish off this universe how it started,” he said. He mashed his upper two fists together. “With a bang!”
“I hear that!” Marc nodded. He crossed over into Sid’s house.
As Marc passed Sid, a wave of discomfort hit him. Sid had switched out his usual t-shirt and jeans. He wore old armor instead. And the metal plating taunted Marc.
Marc’s next question came out more accusatory than curious.
“So… a Lenorkian throwback, huh?” he asked Sid.
Sid had just finished finding the perfect home for his swan. He left it on a shelf next to the front door.
He turned to face Marc. He hid his embarrassment behind a jagged smile.
“Oh!” he said. “Uhhh…” Three of Sid’s arms disappeared behind his back. The cone-shaped cuffs at the end of each wrist clanked against the back of his chest armor. The fourth arm nervously scratched his blue head. “I don’t know,” he said. “It's stupid, I guess. I can take it off… if you want.”
Marc didn’t want to address the topic head-on. He stopped in the cave’s entry. He pretended to admire the walls—as if he’d never seen sandstone before.
“No, leave it on,” he said. “You look… like a true Lenorkian.” He turn around and forced a smile.
It wasn’t enough.
“Okay, let’s get this out of the way,” Sid said. He marched up to Marc.
Sid took a deep breath before he spoke.
“Tonight's really important to me,” he continued. “This is the last impression anyone’s going to make on the universe. So I need you on board.” He continued staring down at Marc. “Can you do that? For me?”
Marc didn’t see what the big deal was. It was just a couple of best friends hanging out.
“Yeah, why not?” he shrugged. “End it the way it started.”
The exchange turned into awkward silence. Neither knew what to do next. They had never been in a situation like this before—never attended such an event. What the Archives called: a par-ty.
Sid shook off the figurative mask he’d been wearing—one that was uncharacteristically dour. His eyes lightened, and he bobbed his head knowingly.
“I went through the Archives to see how this works,” he said. He walked toward the long horizontal counter against the wall—the kitchen.
On the counter, chaos ran wild. Bowls and kitchenware spread across the surface. And the insides of his pots and pans resembled the dirty mouth of a garbage chute.
Marc wasn’t sure what to think. Was cleaning the host’s kitchen a staple of ancient parties?
Sid too seemed a bit confused. His next words came out robotically, as if he was practicing a new word he’d learned.
“’Can-I-offer-you-a-drink?’” Sid asked. He stood nervously in front of the counter.
Looking closer at it, three unusual objects stood apart from the kitchenware mess. It took Marc a while to remember what their outdated, bendy material was called.
Plastic. Three pink and plastic cups sat equidistant from one another.
“I got these from here,” Sid reached under the counter and pulled up some sort of transparent bag. Pink cups just liked the others were stacked on top of each other inside.
Sid packed the bag back under the counter.
“So?” he asked after he finished. He held all four hands together in anticipation. His smile may have looked like an industrial-grade rock shredder, but it was hard to resist his innocent blue face and big wide eyes.
Marc eyed the pink cups one last time.
“This better not kill me,” he said.
Sid wasted no time. He excitedly grabbed a cup and walked over to a large pot sitting on the counter.
Using a nearby ladle, he plunged into the vat. An unappetizing sloshing sound resulted. And Sid, as strong as he was, seemed to struggle with scooping out some of the mystery liquid. But in the end, he pulled back the ladle and unloaded an opaque, muddy liquid into the cup.
“It's a homeworld classic called fludge,” Sid said as he finished pouring.
He treaded over to his reluctant friend and handed off the plastic cup.
“Did you say ‘fludge’?” Marc asked. He swished the cup around cautiously. The earthy liquid hardly budged.
“Yeah, fludge! Us Lenorkians invented it. It’s kind of the only tasty thing we ever bothered to make.”
Marc sniffed it. It smelled… burnt? Maybe a little dusty, too? But he could have just been smelling the cave.
Sid left Marc alone with Marc’s questionable new assignment. He returned to the pot to pour himself a drink.
“Just try it!” he said.
Marc looked down again at the dark soup. It could kill him. Or maybe it wouldn't.
Either way, it was his last drink.
He took a timid sip and waited to be repulsed. The fludge trickled to the back of his tongue. As it hit, Marc’s eyes widened. But not with regret.
He swallowed.
“Now wait a minute…” he said. He smacked his lips together. Then he took another, larger sip.
This curious dark liquid had a unique taste to it. The taste was earthen—but unoffending. It also had a subtle undercurrent of sweetness to it, combined with a spicy kick. It was delicious.
“This might be the best drink in the entire Outpost!” Marc exclaimed.
Pure joy bloomed on Sid’s face. “See! I told you: the greatest thing we ever made.”
He held his own cup above his open jaws. The falling fludge was no match for the alien. He guzzled it down, licked his lips, and then went back for more.
As Sid fashioned himself another drink, Marc noticed something a tad unsettling. A third pink cup stared back at him. It prompted an uncomfortable thought, but he shoved the thought back down.
The Lenorkian carried back his second drink. Though this time, he took it in small, human-sized sips.
But he quickly reanimated. In the middle of a sip, Sid got a wild look in his eyes. His irises turned from their natural violet to scarlet. He yanked the cup from his face and swallowed.
“Argh, how did I forget?” he said. “I got music!”
Marc cut his sip short too. “No way. You got music?”
“I think so!”
Sid did an about face. He slammed the half-empty cup on the counter. Then he shuffled toward a giant metal column protruding from the far wall. Four ink-blue hands wrapped around the cover of the vent. And he went for it.
Sid struggled to pull off the cover of the vent at first. His armor ballooned around his biceps as his muscles bulged outward. Yet the cover wouldn't budge.
But it seemed like an important part of his evening plans. He scolded the stubborn vent, banging on its top.
“Oh, you’re gonna get it now!” he said. He latched onto the vent again.
This time, he put even more effort in. To the point where Marc sensed that Sid was losing a grip on his own body. Out of his forehead, two thumb-sized cones began to rise. His breathing turned low and raspy. And his whole body seemed to expand as he repositioned himself for leverage. Then with one final pull, like a wild beast, he let out of a deep, guttural roar.
“HAWRRRRRRRRRRRGGH!” The roar echoed off the cave walls.
And with that, the stubborn vent cover finally popped off. A breath of wind pulsed through the room as the air pressure equalized itself.
But the wind wasn’t finished. After the initial pulse exited, a mighty gust picked up where the original pulse left off. The vent shot more wind into the room, but rapidly, like a storm. Tiny coarse particles rattled inside the duct. And in the room, a rush of wind whipped past Marc’s face. He felt little nips across his exposed skin as it passed him.
Both partiers shielded their faces from the most direct blasts of air. Sid smiled nervously as he looked to Marc. He raised his voice over the whining airstream.
“It’s from the sandplains above!” he said in an elevated voice. “I thought we’d use the sandstorm for music! Do you like it?”
Music… Marc wasn’t exactly an expert. Even though humans were said to be naturals at it, not much on the subject had made it into the Archives. The Outpost didn’t have much of it either. The closest he got was the occasional chant, stray birds twittering about, or maybe someone banging on rocks.
But Marc did know one thing on the subject. Where there was music, there was dancing.
That said, he had never danced before either. But a long time ago, his parents told him it was something all humans could do. It was something they carried in their blood. Once humans found a pattern in music, they could match it to their body language. And once they’d synced melody and movement, they could ride that wave to a whole new experience.
Might as well give it a shot, he thought. Marc too put his cup on the counter.
With his hands free, Marc backed up toward the middle of the room. He closed his eyes, felt the wind. It filled his ears with its gusty energy. It hit him in pumps as the storm raged above.
Though not totally predictable, the wind did hit him consistently. There was some sort of kinetic pattern to it.
Yes, a pattern.
Well actually, he’d heard it called by another name. What was that word his mother had used? He opened his eyes when he remembered: rhythm.
Marc stretched out his arms. He relaxed his hips. He felt the wind’s whips and waves across his arms. He let his arms follow them, swaying with the current. Not long after, his hips joined in. They too gyrated, trying to match the energetic gusts. He kept at it. And the first time Marc felt both himself and the wind moving together, he grinned.
“This is amazing!” he said. Around them, the wind crooned.
Sid was entranced. He nodded back while staring at Marc’s strange movements. He’d never really seen dancing either. But he figured he would give it a shot too. He loosened up his arms and walked onto the dance floor with Marc.
Before dancing himself, he studied Marc first. He watched how the scavenger moved his arms—and when the scavenger moved his arms.
Sid’s limbs followed. Four muscular arms rose in the air, like fighter jets on their way to a dogfight. And on a one or two second delay, they swayed after Marc’s.
For a while, they followed Marc completely. Then Sid went down his own path. The Lenorkian’s movements grew aggressive and battle-like. He punched at the wind swiping across him. He shuffled his feet as if swapping battle stances.
He caught Marc’s curiosity. Even as a novice, Marc could tell Sid’s movements weren’t traditional by any means. But to Marc, it was dancing all the same.
The two danced to the chorus of the air above. They laughed occasionally as changes in the rhythm of the wind tripped them up. In his head, Marc compared it to the painting on Sid’s door. The colony had never seen anything like this either.
Then something interrupted their dancing. The ground beneath them shook, throwing them off their feet. Heavy gray dirt trickled from the ceiling as the entire cave rumbled. And outside, the distant sky flashed and crackled. Its light illuminated the cave in violent spurts as the boys struggled to stand back up.
Eventually, the violent quaking and frightening flashes died down. The plasma storm held its breath once again.
The boys got back on their feet, but all the joy had seeped out of Sid’s face. He just stared at the floor in deep contemplation. Even as the windy music started back up.
Marc figured he would rescue his friend from whatever dark thoughts had turned up. Naturally, the end of the universe was a real bummer.
“End of the world got you down, huh?” He tried to laugh it off. The whole situation was pretty sad. Especially when they were having so much fun. But it was best to end the universe on a high note, right?
Nevertheless, Sid seemed dejected. He mumbled something inaudible.
“Dude, I can’t hear over the song!” Marc said in an elevated voice.
Sid spoke up over the wind. “That’s not what I’m upset about,” he said, his voice still fairly low.
“Then what are you upset about?”
Sid blurted out his response. “Because I invited Tōn-E, okay?”
He couldn’t bring himself to look Marc in the eye. Because he knew what was coming.
“YOU DID WHAT?!” Marc shouted over the music. Marc himself stomped over to the vent. He picked the cover off the floor—though he struggled quite a bit with it. It was heavier than Sid made it look. But he hoisted it back into the mouth of the vent. The music shut off. The steady drop of sand on the cave floor ceased.
“Say that again,” he leveled in Sid’s direction.
“What was I supposed to do?” Sid remade eye contact. “Not invite the only other intelligent being to the last party the universe will ever have?”
Marc needed no time to answer. He nodded insistently. “Yes. That was exactly what you were supposed to do. What the hell, Sid?” Marc would have continued, but there was another disturbance outside. He caught a glimpse of movement in the doorway.
--
Thanks for reading some of my words :) I’m trying stuff out, so let me know what you think.
The rest of the story is here
Based on this prompt

I feel so tired. I’ve made so many of these post. For the last 8 years I’ve posted about how hard it is for me to stay alive, and I’ve only done it because everyone tells me I shouldn’t kill myself. That it gets better. But I don’t feel better. The therapy didn’t make me feel better. Having friends doesn’t make me feel better. Having money doesn’t make it feel better. Nothing works. I honestly just want to start cutting or something. Anything to make me feel something else. I always say I’ll start self harm but never do. I even fail at hurting myself. Sometimes I punch things, sometimes I pick my skin or punch myself in the head. But I kind of just want to stab myself. I don’t know why. And nothing I do matters. Everyone fails me. Even if it’s not their fault. And I fucking hate it, I hate myself, I hate this shitty world. I hate how alone I am. I hate how unwanted I am. I hate it all. I just want it to go away. I just want to be held and I just want to rest. But I don’t get to have the things I want or need. I don’t get to have anything. I just fucking hate being alive.

(Note: this is the second half of the story. Will link the first half shortly)
The two teens both looked toward the front of the room. There was a gray sphere. Hovering in the doorway.
But if you asked Marc, it was an annoying gray sphere. And it hovered in the doorway like an absolute rustnut.
Marc wasn’t sure where on the sphere to level his disdain. The whole dumb surface was the same all over. It was a series of interconnected, translucent hexagons. Stupid yellow lights blinked sporadically across its many faces—for no apparent rhyme or reason—perhaps just to further annoy Marc.
An electronic voice called out from the sphere. “Did I hear muuuuuusic?” he asked. “Before that last plasma burst?”
Marc shot Sid a glare that could kill. But the big blue alien didn’t back down.
“Last impression. Remember?” he told Marc before going toward Tōn-E with a brimming, sharp-toothed smile and arms extended. “Tōn-E! Glad you could make it! Come on in.”
On the inside, Marc cringed. He mostly tried to forget that Tōn-E walked (hovered?) the same Levels as them. Tōn-E represented the most self-destructive habits of the Outpost. The only features of the city indifferent to survival.
But Tōn-E was all too real. He entered the room like a ghost in a nightmare.
“I am also happy to be here,” he said. The faces of his sphere randomly lit up as he spoke. “I otherwise had no plans for tonight. Because the planet is set to explode.”
“Yes, I’ve heard,” Sid joked.
“I approximate it will only take a few more—hold on. What is this??”
Tōn-E spun slowly in the air. The side previously facing Sid rotated toward the ceiling. When it reached the top, a spotlight shot toward the ceiling—right where Sid’s door had slotted in.
The spotlight stretched horizontally across the door until it resembled a straight line. This line swept back and forth across the raised door. It moved as if he was cleaning it.
“I don’t believe it!” Tōn-E said. “What an exquisite painting. A remarkable addition to your growing and ever-expanding portfolio, Sid.”
Tōn-E finished his scan of the painting. His expanding spotlight shut off. And he re-centered himself to face Sid.
“Aww, shanks,” Sid said. Each of his right arms latched onto the bends of the left ones. “You really think so?”
“Of course! There are colors here I’ve only seen named in the logs. You have tastefully incorporated /#FF00FF: a color our ancestors previously referred to as ‘magenta.’”
“Yes! That’s right! I was going for ‘magenta!’ You really think I did it?”
Marc looked down to hide his face. He rolled his eyes. Magenta. He would have loved to tell Sid how much he liked it too. But Marc had spent his years surviving, not studying colors in old, useless historical archives.
Sid and Tōn-E continued their snooty, pretentious discussion.
“I made it mixing legblee blood and just a liiiiiiittle bit of groundwater,” Sid said.
“That was a very clever! Allow me to save your painting to my internal memory.”
“Really??” Sid’s cheeks greened a little.
“Yes, I will review at a later time when I am both unable to view the original but would still like to once again be inspired by your clever and skillful hands.”
“Tōn-E, I—I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”
Marc simmered in his anger. Stupid Tōn-E. Always ruining things. Making them about him and his dumb, endless archives.
“I am perhaps only more impressed by your chosen ensemble! Do my eyes perceive veritable Lenorkian armor?”
The talkative orb whooshed toward Sid. It began revolving around him like an annoyingly-attached moon. As his exo-orb hummed excitedly, Tōn-E rattled off his useless knowledge of antiquated armor.
“Snorp-resistant spiked shoulder caps?!” He spun around Sid’s midsection. “Triple-layered chest plates?!” He dropped closer to the floor. “Anti-gravity shin guards made from the rare lenorkium alloy?!”
Tōn-E giggled as he orbited Sid. His laugh disturbed Marc. It sounded like a space rat being strangled in the bowels of an undersea air vent.
Sid could hardly keep up with Tōn-E’s flying. But he looked happy with the attention. “Yeah! I’m told this suit was built for the Frost Ring wars,” he said. “It never got used.”
Marc continued to not engage. He slunk deeper into his shawl, folded his arms, and sighed.
“I don’t believe it!” Tōn-E said.
He backed off from Sid, flying back toward the doorway. He turned on his spotlight once again. It now stretched over Sid’s body. “Saving! Saving!”
Sid wasted no time posing for the occasion. He flexed all four arms and gritted his snaggling teeth. His irises turned a deep red and his two small horns protruded from his forehead. Tōn-E was overjoyed. “I did not think I would ever have the chance to record your agitated state,” he said.
I’ll show you an agitated state, Marc thought to himself.
“I’ve got a relic you’re going to love,” Tōn-E said. His tiny sphere filled the cave with noise. But it wasn’t Tōn-E’s usual metallic voice. The sound came from another species entirely.
“GwwwwwwuuuhhhAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!”
His orb played an intense, ear-shuddering roar. The recording may have been slightly fuzzy, but Marc knew the source. It was unmistakably Lenorkian.
And like the gears in a drill, something appeared to “click” inside Sid. His eyes widened. His armored chest expanded. And he joined in. But Sid’s roar was… authentic.
“HRRRRRRRRRGAAAAAAAAHHHHH” he blasted out of mouth. Marc’s entire rib cage vibrated uncomfortably.
It spooked Marc. Igniting some primal desire to escape a dangerous predator. That was a feeling he never felt around Sid. He didn’t like it.
Sid himself even looked embarrassed for a second. Something he’d kept suppressed had slipped out. But Tōn-E turned up the volume on his recording. And with a cautious smile of someone nervously breaking a rule, Sid matched it. And then some. The two bellowed together. It was enough to make Marc queasy, although it was unclear whether it was due to the vibrations or Sid bonding so much with Tōn-E.
The roaring continued. Their talking continued. Tōn-E went on about Sid’s armor some more and his people’s valor and the hardship his ancestors must have faced.
“Usually I keep this stuff stashed away,” Sid said to Tōn-E in his soft normal voice. His horns had retracted, and his eyes had returned to normal. “These are shameful pieces of our history. Truly. And with a people I never really fit in with. But tonight, it just felt right to wear it, you know?”
“I understand completely,” Tōn-E said. “It is in these end times that we gravitate toward those traditions that were so much of what made us feel alive in the first place.”
The statement made Marc want to hurl. He didn’t want to entertain such stupid notions. But the gremlin rotated to him next.
“Hello Marc! Did you find any good junk today? Any new additions to your scrap pile?”
Marc seethed. “I didn't scavenge today, Tōn-E. There wouldn't be any use. It's the end of the universe.”
“That surprises me. Humans love their junk and doodads.”
“Yeah well, we don’t have to cling to the past, do we? Not like that ever saved anyone.” He hugged his wrapped arms even tighter, tilting his body away from Sid and Tōn-E. His cold shoulder ended the conversation.
Sid picked it back up. “So Tōn-E, do you, uh… drink?”
As it turned out, he did. Tōn-E accepted a cup of fludge. He held it with a robotic arm—one that had suddenly extended from his exo-orb. Tōn-E’s orb whirred as the center of his “face” sprouted a grotesque, needle-like proboscis. It poked outward like a long nose.
This straw extended into the cup he held. Tōn-E sipped the fludge like an insect sipping nectar (whatever those two things were; the Archives were spotty).
Sid waited with anticipation. Then Tōn-E’s sphere shuddered. The fludge must have reached the insufferable little creature on the inside. “Scrumptious!” he said.
Marc sighed quietly to himself. For some reason, he thought the night would have made a turn for the better if Tōn-E had hated it.
“Two for two!” Sid pumped three victorious fists into the air. He grinned as Tōn-E’s straw dipped into the cup once more. The straw made a little slurping sound.
“My taste buds are tingling!” Tōn-E said.
But the big cup was too much for him to finish. He returned the mostly-full drink to Sid. And his robotic straw receded to his exo-orb. Sid of course finished the cup, slurping up the remaining pool of fludge.
“So…” Sid said. He wiped his mouth. “Should I put some tunes back on?” He pointed over his shoulder to the idle vent. Then he looked across his two guests for an answer.
Marc shrugged. He didn’t care about anything anymore. Next to Marc, Tōn-E bobbed excitedly.
“Oh, yes!” he said. “One reads about concepts such as scales and measures, but it is entirely different to actually experience them with one’s own body!”
What body? Marc thought to himself. And what were the other things Tōn-E had mentioned? Something about… measuring… dragons?
He studied the cave floor while Sid skipped to the vent.
“That’s what I’m talking about!” Sid said. “Get those Level 7 legs ready!” He tugged at the creaking cover once more.
It came off easier this time. With a pop! the storm above returned to the cave. Its natural melody filled the room.
“Woooooooo!” Sid raised his hands again and walked back toward the other two.
Tōn-E mimicked him with two twig arms.
But the music didn’t have the same magic as before. The beats were stale. And Marc found himself unable to ignore the sting of the sand pelting his face. He lifted his shawl over his mouth. His voice was barely audible.
“I’m sitting this song out,” he said.
The other two didn't seem to hear him. They were facing each other, waving their arms sporadically against the air current.
Marc didn’t care. He grabbed his unfinished drink from the kitchen. Then he searched for a place to sit.
He found a couch, just in front of the dancing aliens. As he took his seat, his bottom started to sink into the sofa. The tarp covering the couch crinkled.
He tried guessing the material underneath it. Clay, maybe? He pondered the question while watching Sid and Tōn-E figure out dancing without him.
“This is how Marc was doing it before!” Sid said to Tōn-E. His four arms fanned across the breeze.
But he got everything wrong. His arms whipped around the wind, not with it. And he was thinking too much about his next move, as evidenced by his scrunched brows. But the greatest offense of all was his midsection: his hips and legs stayed in place—as if someone had threatened them.
A part of Marc wanted to get up and show him how it was done. But another part wanted to see Sid fail. Realize the effort was futile. Give up on bonding with Tōn-E. And kick the Sphere of Useless Facts out of his house.
“Am I doing it right, Marc?” Sid asked while each of his arms flew in a different direction.
“You look great!” Marc replied. He took a long sip of fludge.
Tōn-E, on the other hand, did his best to replicate Sid. He waved his skinny arms erratically. It almost made Marc laugh; Tōn-E looked like he’d been set on fire.
But in all, the whole thing was awful. A bad impression giving birth to an even worse impression.
And they didn’t seem to be enjoying it much either. Despite Marc’s glowing endorsement, Sid and Tōn-E danced themselves to the brink.
Sid kept losing his balance. He tried to keep up with the music but flung himself too hard in any one direction. And every time he made a misstep, he’d let loose an acidic snarl. Tōn-E grew frustrated as well. Every few seconds, he simply froze. His exterior lights would blink red in error. As Marc had hoped, the two “painting pals” quickly ran out of steam.
The dancing halted altogether. A tired Sid returned to the vent and hoisted the grate back onto the vent’s mouth. The music stopped.
“I’ll just turn it down for a minute,” he said. He adjusted a dial on the grate. The metal slits creaked open. And a muted sandstorm flowed through them.
The music reflected the overall energy in the room: depleted. Sid secured himself two more cups of fludge before joining Marc on the tarp couch.
Tōn-E followed his lead. The little troll took a seat too, which meant hovering over the last open spot on the other side of Marc.
The boys took a minute to relax on the couch. They sat quietly while the plasma storm above the Outpost boomed and cracked.
Well, Sid and Tōn-E relaxed. They chugged down another couple cups of fludge and floated quietly over the couch (respectively). Meanwhile, Marc continued to be annoyed. He considered stepping outside and climbing to Level 1. Offer himself to the plasma storm a few hours early. The non-stop hum of Tōn-E’s exo-orb goaded him further.
Brrrrrrrrr!
Did it really have to make that noise?
Marc didn’t think the afternoon could get any worse. And then it did. Because Tōn-E’s insufferable humming suddenly quieted. And that only could have meant…
“Oh!” Tōn-E exclaimed, “I know what we can talk about!”
Marc braced for impact. His nails dug into his knees.
Don’t you dare, he thought.
“I read the most interesting fact about cats today!” Tōn-E started.
Not again, Marc thought. Absolutely NOT again. His fists trembled with rage.
“Did you know cats were the central deity across ten different ancient civilizations? The trend started with humans, of course, but the religion quickly spread across the galaxy as interplanetary travel became more widely available.”
“I actually didn’t know that,” Sid said, entertaining Tōn-E’s ridiculous theory. “Where did you find that?”
“The Archives! They have somewhat documented this phenomenon. You see, it was a common practice to capture footage of cats, even in their sleeping state. They were so important to these cultures that even the most mundane moment yielded significant reason to capture and worship them. If you want to see, I can—”
Marc had had enough. He slammed his cup down on the floor and flew off the couch.
“—SHUT UP. SHUT UP ABOUT CATS!” he shouted. He swung back around to face the other two. “CATS AREN’T REAL TŌN-E! AND THEY WERE NEVER REAL!”
“That’s enough, Marc!” Sid clenched his teeth.“Don’t start this.”
Marc returned fire, “I didn’t start anything; that was YOU. Going behind my back! Inviting more of these… fairy tales!”
His emotions overwhelmed him. He didn’t know whether to yell more or start crying. He did both.
“It’s the end of the universe!” he said as tears streamed down his face. “We can’t keep clinging to the things that brought us to this point in the first place! All these stupid traditions are the reason no one’s even here with us now! IT KILLED THEM ALL! And anyone stupid enough to keep believing in them is—"
“—I said THAT’S ENOUGH!” Sid growled. Marc didn't care.
“NO!” he said. Then he looked back at Tōn-E. “NONE of what you’re seeing in the Archives is real! The data is corrupt! It’s ALL CORRUPT! And CATS are just another dumb fairy tale to keep people like you going, while…”
He ran out of steam. He realized there was no more “going.” In fact, there was no time remaining in the universe for anything. But that didn’t diminish his animosity and anger toward the world. He glared down at the gray sphere. His chest heaved.
Meanwhile, Sid kept a cooler, bluer head. He too looked to Tōn-E, but with compassion in his eyes.
Tōn-E didn’t immediately respond to either. The only sound in the room came from his exo-orb. Well, the exo-orb plus the ladle on the counter, which suddenly blooped into the big pot.
All eyes were on the atypically quiet alien, whose hexagonal faces began to light up.
“I suppose,” his voice trailed, “that cats may not have been real after all. You said it yourself: records are foggy. They’re all from thousands of years ago...” He sighed. Tōn-E’s lights transitioned to a new blinking pattern. “And I also suppose… that I should have been more mature about interpreting error-prone information in the Archives…”
“It's okay, man,” Sid said. “I like that you dream big.” He reached across the couch to place a comforting hand on Tōn-E. But Tōn-E floated out of reach.
“I understand my presence here is probably upsetting,” he said. “You two have a special bond. I should not have interfered with it in its last moments. I will go.”
“No, Tōn-E,” Sid said. Each pair of his hands met in front of his chest “Please stay. You have every right to be here too.”
“I should go,” Tōn-E said. “I will spend the rest of the evening focused on real things. And because I will no longer be here, I suppose it will be the perfect opportunity to review Sid’s art so I can feel inspired for the end times.”
He slipped between Sid and Marc toward the doorway.
“No, don’t!” Sid called after him. “We should do this together.”
But Tōn-E had already vanished outside.
The Lenorkian, hand extended, waited for Tōn-E to come back. But the floating sphere did not reappear in the doorway.
And that was when a low trill emanated from the couch. It was coming from Sid’s his chest. He looked up at Marc, glaring. He bared his pointed teeth. His horns reappeared. And his eyes flushed with scarlet pigment.
Yuh-oh, Marc thought. About half his prior anger evaporated. Fear of a fight took hold.
Marc didn’t exactly dislike his chances. Lenorkians may have been stronger, but Sid wasn't a fighter. Marc was.
But Sid stuck to his morals.
“GET OUT!” Sid shouted.
Marc reflexively jumped out of reach. The short hop sort of ruined his show of anger. But he was still boiling mad. After all, fifty percent of him hadn't abandoned the cat grudge.
“Fine!” he shouted back. “Have fun exploding alone.” He whipped away to the exit.
The party was finished now. He almost stopped and went back for his fludge. But he didn’t want it anymore either. He just wanted a nice end of the universe with his friend. And now the end of the universe was ruined.
At least the apocalypse outside was behaving predictably. Marc stepped into the adjacent cave corridor. He surveyed the damage outside, looking through the long, horizontal gap in the cave wall. As the experts had predicted, the plasma storm took its toll.
The canyon glowed eerily bright, despite it being evening time. The wind howled as it raced through the canyon. And the cliffs around the gorge flashed white and pink as the storm charged with electricity, preparing to make its final jump.
Lightning cracked toward the ground. Some of the bolts hit the opposing cliff, sending rubble deep into the gorge. A gentle tremor rumbled in the ground beneath him.
The plasma storm overhead only creeped further around the planet. As the canyon brightened, shockwaves coursed through the entire city. They threw Marc off his feet again. He hit the ground.
Behind him, thunderous clacking erupted. The sound of falling rocks filled the corridor. He flipped over to see what explosion had thrown him.
It was bad. He stopped breathing. Because he could no longer see Sid’s home. All he saw was a pile of rubble.

Here is the run down of the last year. My job initially said moving from Utah to Texas would qualify me for a pay increase, so I moved to Texas. Two months later, they finally tell me that the states pay is actually equal to Utah and so a pay increase was not going to happen. I accepted this. We are a family of 3 and have done as much as we could while there. I couldn't go outside much because I'd get bit by hundreds of mosquito's at a time which made me miserable. I tolerated the heat, but not being able to just go on a walk sucked.
Two months after moving, a dog showed up on our porch and so we took her in. We knew Texas pups were prone to having issues, but we didn't know what we would end up with later as time goes on. She is such a beautiful breed, but she can't be left alone or else the house ends up destroyed due to her abandonment issues. Weeks after she showed up, I found out I was pregnant. I tried applying for medical through the state and kept getting denied every month with no valid explanation. I had no medical elsewhere so I was frustrated over this. Part of me didn't want this pregnancy if I couldn't manage to find care.
We made the decision to move back to Washington because of the following reasons:

• My job said Washington was for sure a higher cost of living state so I would get a pay increase
• I would qualify for state medical and finally get care
• The western side of the state does not have as many mosquitos making it amazing to be in

Well, sad newsflash. Before moving, our new dog ended up so sick that we had to pay $1500 to keep her alive. yep! $1500!
My job, AFTER I MOVED, decided it wasn't within their BUDGET to give me a pay increase even though they said moving to Washington is a qualifying factor. Kudos to my remote job for screwing me ONCE AGAIN. Then following the new move, as we are staying in motels while finding a place to live, our dog almost died AGAIN! This time it was $1700 to save her! We tapped nearly every aspect of our resources to cover this poor pups health.
Also, although I work remotely, my spouse does gig work (instacart), therefore having a car is necessary for his job. Well, our cars engine died and we ended up using the last of our savings to lease a car, costing us the option to rent a home now. We literally have nothing left at this point as we pay $2580 a month for motels (We have to leave every 10 days because of some residency law Washington has).
So I decided maybe we can buy a home so I can pull money from my 401k since the only approved withdrawal is a hardship withdrawal for closing costs or medical. I only qualified for $150k which shows how little we make (considering I'm on shit Utah wages).
I was approved for state medical in April and could start seeing doctors in May (8 months into the pregnancy). Don't judge me. I did what I could do with what I had available to me based on my situation.
Baby is due this month (June 2023) and I have been repeatedly told to wait to buy a home until I get a pay increase. Yeah...Okay. Like that's going to happen. LOL. I'm nothing more than a customer service rep so I will never be more than a low wage employee. I know my value in this world is bottom level shit. I emailed habitat for humanity, but they never responded. They don't call me back either, so I am assuming they just don't want to say "Go back to school and get a degree that's worth something and isn't "business"."
I applied for food benefits and was told I made too much even though I barely eat 1 meal a day thanks to not having any money to manage my gestational diabetic diet. My spouse and child do get to eat 3 meals a day because they are being restricted.
Now lets add that my clinic was bought out by a bigger hospital and now my 11 year old can't be in the private waiting area like we had planned. We have no family around to watch him or our dog because they'll be in Utah for a family reunion. I have no friends in this state. So now my spouse will be forced to watch him as I give birth alone with zero support instead of him being in a tiny waiting area in the birthing center so I could have support. I don't even want to give birth now! I regret ever getting pregnant now and that's such a shitty feeling when I've wanted a second child for 10 years!
I am lost as to what to do now. No pay increase. We have literally nothing for baby. Living in motels. Zero savings. No family close by that can even help. The family that could help eventually wanted us to leave which is why we left to Texas to begin with. We don't qualify for food benefits even though all I can afford is Ramen or PB&Js and with that, I can't eat it since I'm a gestational diabetic, leaving me to starve. I applied for so many different housing options to be told there is a 1 year wait list. We can't hold up in motels for a year. I'll die from starvation and even then, we wouldn't be able to pay a deposit. We've tried starting a GoFundMe but our families don't know our situation, therefore asking for money from strangers feels wrong. We can't get help through the VA, we've tried.
I don't know what else to do. I need advice. Guidance. Something to give me peace of mind. I'm so broken that I think suicide is better than living. Part of me hopes I die in labor so my spouse can get my life insurance, not that it'll help a ton. I feel worthless. Pathetic. Stupid. Hopeless.
I'm lost.

There are tones of fighting games out there infact the Fighting Game has had a bit of a renaissance in the last few years with

• Mortal Kombat 10/11
• Tekkan 7
• The King of Fighters XV
• Street Fighter 6

There is also Dead or Alive 6 but I don’t count that as if you want the full story you need to buy character packs each pack is £30 and with 20 characters you are looking at a £600 game so we don’t count that they are remaking the first game so don’t count it out yet
ut I digress what is your favourite Fighting game one of the ones I have listed above or something else.
Currently I am loving SF6.

I have been depressed since I was 12 and I am now 23.
Throughout this period of time I have had periods of severe depression and suicide attempts, periods of hypomania and hospitalization, and periods of normalcy.
But as I’m exiting a period of normalcy and returning to depression I just don’t think I’ll ever actually want to be alive.
I don’t enjoy being alive, it’s difficult, and boring in a deeply painful way, and it’s scary, and I don’t like myself. I don’t fucking like this. And I’m not ever going to like it, it’s just not for me. I can see why some people really enjoy being alive but there’s nothing that would make me like this. My dream job, a perfect partner, the ability to do whatever I want—nothing makes this seem actually being alive appealing enough.
The happy moments are great, laughing with friends is something I love; but it’s just not worth it. Those little moments aren’t life, they are little moments, and they do not make up for how much I detest being alive.
I just don’t think being alive is enjoyable and I wish I was allowed to just opt out.

Sorry if this is dumb, but I thought I'd ask to be sure. While downloading, Last Seen Complete is pretty self-explanatory. However, I was looking around and noticed that the things I'm actively seeding have it listed as today, whereas the things that are stalled seeding have older dates. Is this something I can rely on or is there some other factor at play?
I just want to make sure because my system has limited space and every so often I need to delete some of my torrents, but I don't like deleting ones with low seeders because I like keeping them alive. However, because of this I've built up a lot of torrents that have single-digit seeders. I've built up pretty high ratios on some of them, but I also don't see many of them active anymore. A lot of them are single episodes of TV shows and most people probably just get them by torrenting the whole season these days. If I can consistently see the last time one of these was actually active, it'd give me another metric for deciding what I can get rid of when I need to free up space.

Horror Movies! Here are options for downloading or watching Evil Dead Rise streaming the full movie online for free on 123movies & Reddit, including where to watch the latest installment …
Horror Movies! Here are options for downloading or watching Evil Dead Rise streaming the full movie online for free on 123movies & Reddit, including where to watch the latest installment in Sam Raimi’s legendary horror franchise movies at home. Is Evil Dead Rise 2023 available to stream? Is watching Evil Dead Rise on HBO Max, Netflix, Disney Plus or Amazon Prime? Yes, we have found an authentic streaming option/service.

Watch Now: Evil Dead Rise Online Free

Watch Now: Evil Dead Rise Online Free
The Evil Dead franchise is officially back, and it’s bringing yet another fright of a movie. When the last film debuted in theaters a decade ago in 2013, no one expected for creator Sam Raimi to have a renewed focus on a series that started back in 1981. Today, with yet another dose of nostalgia, fans of the horror genre are gearing up to watch the continuation via Evil Dead Rise.
Directed by Lee Cronin, the film follows Ellie (Alyssa Sutherland) a young woman who lives with her three children in a Los Angeles apartment. When her sister Beth (Lily Sullivan) drops in for a visit, an earthquake hits their building and leaves a hole in the parking lot. The kids investigate and realize that they hold the Book of the Dead, which unleashes an evil spirit that finds and possesses Ellie. Will she wreak havoc on the family and lose everything she’s worked for, or will everyone make it out alive?
It’s definitely an intriguing concept, and longtime viewers will want to see it in any way they can. But for those who are wondering how to watch and stream Evil Dead Rise from their home, it will be a while before that happens. Luckily, we did some research and have an idea about a streaming date

Okay, so I know the title is a bit odd... but it's true! I was always terrible at keeping plants alive. They would all die within a few weeks. Just no matter what I did, I was terrible at it, okay? I would have loved to be a green witch but I was just terrible at it.
Now, fast forward to last year. My grandmother got sick. I became her nurse. And when she passed away I took her two plants in. I don't know why I did it. But... they wouldn't die. One of them actually started to flourish in my care. And okay, after some months I started feeling a bit overconfident. So I bought three more.
Flourished as well.
I started gardening, really fell in love with it. I have an Aloe Vera and used it when I got a sunburn, so I'm going to try and make a witches' garden. My mother had a plant that was near death and in my heart and soul I just know what it needed. She had two other plants who were near death and I took them in and now they're slowly coming back.
Seriously, what the hell????? I'm a bit freaked out actually. Does anyone have experience with this? Maybe it's a coincidence but it's just too weird!

According from data from the Himalayan Database (Mointainiq.com), here are the death rates for the following mountains:
Edit: these are the percentages of deaths from people trying to reach the summit.
Annapurna l: 29.5%
Kangchenjunga: 29.1%
K2: 22.9%
Dhaulagiri I: 21.9%
Nanga Parbat: 20.8%
Mount Everest: 14.1%
Makalu: 13.6%
Disclaimer: some of these mountains were marked as data from 2018, Im pretty sure the rest were from 2021. But just know these are from sometime in the past few years.
What do all these mountains have in common? They are all over 8,000 meters tall. As many of you are probably aware, above 8,000 meters on Everest is known as the death zone. There is such little oxygen that your body’s cells start to die and even with extra oxygen to help you breathe you still can’t last long. Someone described it as “running on a treadmill and breathing through a straw”.
I do not think we allow people to summit these mountains for the obvious reason: so many of them die. Some of you may think that dying only affects the person who choose to climb the mountain, but that’s wrong.
Dying is inherently one of the most selfish things you can do (I’m not talking about when you didn’t choose to die. But the climbers knew there was a good chance they would die). Those people had parents, siblings, children, other family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, etc. That will mourn their death for years to sometimes their whole lives. Think about their pets who will always wait for them to come home. Think about how many pets are given to shelters, and are among the first to be put down at shelters, when their owner dies. One of my friends had an ex who was quiète literally the worst person I’ve ever met. I won’t go into details, but all he did was hurt and exploit the people around him. She left him, and was much happier and didn’t think twice about him. But when he passed away she became depressed and it really affected her. Even to this day it affects her. And she hated him when he was alive. That is how much death affects those around you. Now imagine how much worse it would have been for my friend if she had liked this guy? What if she loved him?
People who climb these mountains are okay with putting those they love through hell just so they can go on and adventure then brag about it. There are plenty of other things to do to get that same sense of achievement and adventure.

Spot will kill Miles’ dad. But it won’t be enough. In his quest for greatness, to be Miles’ top villain, he will continue destroying Miles’ universe, becoming a black hole of sorts to gradually destroy it (the Ultimate universe ends as well after all).
In universe 42, we’ll get to see all of Spidey’s Rogues against Miles, Gwen and team. It will be glorious.
Miles will find a way to travel not only through dimensions but time as well, making it so the spider never came into his universe, and instead bites the other Miles, so that he wouldn’t become Prowler, so that his own dad would still be alive, that he will never have been Spider-Man, and his universe will survive.
Gwen’s Spidey sense still sends her to Miles’ universe and they still end up meeting in school. During the revised collider incident, Spider-Gwen saves the day such that the collider never explodes and Spot is never created.
When it comes to college time, Miles secretly wants to pursue art, but he doesn’t want to disappoint his parents (with Jeff often putting down his brother’s art, his actions in general), sending him to the science high school and all. With a growing divide between him and his parents, instead spending more and more time with his bad influence of an uncle, Spider-Miles from the other dimension will pop over (having been sent back to the wrong dimension on his own multiversal quest), running into our Miles, who tells our Miles to share his secret with his parents, and not to shut them out, not while he still has them.
Upon seeing Miles’ decision, Gwen ends things with Miles, goes back home to her own universe, suggesting she’ll come out to her dad.
Our animated Miles’ story is over, moving beyond these Spider-Verse shenanigans, but that’s okay for us, because a live action Miles is next.